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Having regrets ...

(6 Posts)
Fairy45 Fri 14-Apr-17 20:16:34

So I had a baby 2 years ago, with a guy i was engaged to but he met someone while i was pregnant, we split up and an old flame of mine reappeared in my life having been the other side of the world for a couple of years. We were sort of seeing each other but he kept blowing hot and cold about whether to stay in UK or go away again etc and we sort of drifted apart after about a year. I was still very much in touch with babys dad as they had contact too and at this point he was single as was I and we spent a few family days together and on a couple of occasions he stayed the night. In jan i found out i was pregnant so we decided to make a go of it and yea things are perfectly fine we have just been on holiday together as a family and its ace. However this old flame got in touch in feb to tell me how much he misses me and that he loves me and was too scared before bla bla bla and wants us to be together etc... i just sort of said too late and forgot about it but hes just messaged me today and its just making me think what if...? Like i know that me and the kids dad wont be together forever because he cant stay faithful and it will only be a matter of time.... advice/tell me to snap out of it

MyPerfectCousin Fri 14-Apr-17 20:29:58

1) Start using contraception.

2) Be single for a bit. It's not compulsory that you're in a relationship.

That's all I've got.

Fairy45 Fri 14-Apr-17 21:28:35

The first baby was tried for desperately for 18 months, 2nd baby i was on the coil so was a huge shock but once you start googling a lot more common than you think

WhooooAmI24601 Fri 14-Apr-17 21:34:21

I can believe the thing about the coil; I've had two fitted and both have come out 4/5 weeks later, so it must be more common than you'd think.

However, if you know you're not going to be with your children's Dad forever, end it and be by yourself for a while. Exes are exes for a reason; the one who has drifted in and out for the last 2 years sounds as though he's not got a clue what or who he wants, so don't do the "what if" dance, thinking you can change him or he'll suddenly decide he's head-over-heels in love with you. He'll have you for a while then drift away again. Hold out for someone who devotes himself to you properly.

QuiteLikely5 Fri 14-Apr-17 21:34:21

You've got two children to factor in. Think about them instead of yearning after someone who didn't want you enough previously

pictish Fri 14-Apr-17 21:38:18

Err...it's not a one or the other situation is it? How about neither?

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