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Internet dating as scary freak show?

(3 Posts)
ScaredMoi Thu 13-Apr-17 11:52:19

Have just started putting my toe in the water here with online dating (I'm 48).

Looked around at couple of sites, the free ones and a couple of paid ones.

However, am quite taken back to see that so many of the men look and sound positively weird. Even the OK-ish looking guys often have really strange profiles.

How do other people cope with this? I feel quite simultaneously sad and freaked out by some of what I see and read... any hints on how to manage to do this without feeling overwhelmed? Did you keep at it?!

noego Thu 13-Apr-17 13:08:58

Have fun with it. It is amusing. Some profiles are so far fetched. Don't take it seriously.

scoobydoo1971 Thu 13-Apr-17 13:19:19

There are some normal people using OLD. However, they are needles in a haystack of the following types:

Narcissistic personality disorders...I love me, and no-one I know in the real world does because they know better. Look at me, look at my selfies, I am lush don't you think...lets talk about me, me, me.
Pathological loners and sexual outliers...people who struggle to make real-world social connections and people with ecclectic tastes in sexual behaviour that you may or may not share.
Bitter divorced men who are dying to take their angst out on all women who come after her are just as evil as she was...
Bored mid-life crisis married men who find OLD an easy, discrete and lazy way to ease domestic fatigues and score a bit on the side.
Scammers who want money, and the emotionally needy who need a social worker or psychotherapist really.
Stalkers who turn up at your front door uninvited (another words, don't give out your details or clues that could make you traceable until you are sure they are ok).
Liars...their photo is old, their career is not as it seems, their life isn't as great as they project...

I feel there is a perception that OLD is for sad and desperate people who cannot find a mate elsewhere. Some men think of it as a hook-up platform for random one-nighters. Of course this is nonsense, and the reality is a lot of people use it who use it because they are just too busy or otherwise reluctant to meet partners elsewhere. It can potentially be a good way to find someone with shared interests, but there are an awful lot of weirdos too out there too. Hearing my friend's adventures in OLD make me shudder and feel glad to be married.

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