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Feel like a terrible mother

(4 Posts)
WrongPlaceWrongTime Wed 12-Apr-17 20:38:41

I'm a single parent, currently going through a horrible divorce and I'll admit I'm struggling, but I do try my best. Some days are great, some days are mediocre, others I just about get through and others, like today are horrid from start to finish.

My dcs are 4 and 7, for the most part they get on well but dc1 likes to be in control of the games that are played and how they are played, dc2 will go along with this up to a point but tends to get fed up with being bossed about at times. This results in dc2 lashing out and dc1 stropping about the house. Some days I can ignore, others I have to intervene. After a stern talking to this afternoon dc1 disappears to her room in tears and returns with a note for me. In a nutshell saying I am always shouting at her and that she doesn't feel part of anything anymore. We talk and all calms down.

Later on, dc1 kicks dc2 for not moving quickly enough, again I pull her up on this, she gets upset again.

At bedtime I remark that dc1 needs to tidy her room, again she gets upset and tells me she doesn't feel part of the family as I'm always shouting at her and she feels like I don't like her. On top of everything I just feel like the worlds worst mother today.

I cried in front of the dcs earlier, not proud of that but I can't do anything about it now. Now dc1 is distraught as she thinks it's all her fault and she made me cry.

I don't know what I'm asking but I feel like shit and just needed to anonymously offload somewhere.

Astro55 Wed 12-Apr-17 20:41:26

Well my parents divorced and it was the best thing they did!

It's understandable your head is all over the place and not with the children -

Get out of the house as much as possible - local park free stuff in the library - clear all your heads

It will pass and things will get better

WrongPlaceWrongTime Wed 12-Apr-17 21:25:27

Thank you. I've no doubt that the divorce is a good thing but just getting through it is hard.

I'm so worried about the dcs and the effect that I'm personally having on them though. I just feel like I'm failing them in every way.

Cricrichan Wed 12-Apr-17 21:36:45

Sounds like normal sibling/kids behaviour to me xx

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