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Questioning the safety of my ex husbands driving

(6 Posts)
Petalpower16 Sun 09-Apr-17 19:35:38

Apologies if the is on the wrong thread. It is my first time posting but I would love advice from others as I'm worried my opinion is jaded and too close to the issue to be rational.

I am concerned over my ex husbands driving.

A number of times my kids have commented that they feel their dad has road rage and his driving has been unsafe.

This weekends visit I received 2 texts from both my children about an incident with his driving.

My son had forgotten something and asked my dad to go back for it before coming home. He turned the car round and headed back at speed. During a tight bend the rear end of the vehicle skidded and screeched. Then he had to hard swing the car back in to avoid an oncoming car.
Kids are 12 and 13 so we're old enough to speak to him about it when they pulled in at KFC
When I confronted him when he dropped them home he said that it was due to a dusty road, he hadn't even angry or aggressive and they had both over reacted and were fine once they'd chatted about it.

I quoted back to him one of the comments made and said that they felt unsafe to the point that they didn't want to be out with him if he drove like that.

As usual he accepted no responsibility.

Having chatted with both kids since being home they have both said his driving is very different when his partner is in the car and that neither of them want to be in the car when he is driving, but are fine if it's her driving.

My biggest concern is i want them to follow this decision through if this is how they feel, otherwise they shouldn't make empty threats to him.

This isn't the first time the kids have been concerned with his driving.
For back ground:
In the 20 years I've known him he has been involved in 7 accidents. One resulting in him being in intensive care for 2 weeks, luckily the police had chosen not to press charges on this occasion as it was only him that had been injured. He's always claimed no responsibility for any of them.
I worry I'm over reacting, but these are my babies.

Thanks in advance for your help x

Minime85 Sun 09-Apr-17 20:12:56

I'd chAt to police

PollytheDolly Sun 09-Apr-17 20:58:04

What's he so angry about? Road rage is an easy outlet for that.

More importantly, he needs to put his DCs first and stop acting like a twat on the road.

He's in denial for sure. Can you insist no DCs in the car whilst he's driving? I'm sure that's not practical is it.

I would though.

JK1773 Sun 09-Apr-17 21:37:36

I had an ex who used to do this when he was angry. On occasions when he was cross with me he would drive like a maniac to scare me. I once asked him if he'd drive like that if we had DC and they were in the car (thankfully we didn't have kids) and he said 'no of course not!' So why he felt the need to put my life in danger who knows. Actually just thinking about it again makes me rage inside. What a twat he was. If your ex wasn't angry that's inexplicable behaviour with your DC in the car

Kittencatkins123 Mon 10-Apr-17 00:20:27

You are not overreacting. You say your kids have spoken to you about him doing this a number of times. They don't feel safe being in the car with him. He's had a huge number of accidents, some very serious. It's a care issue.

Have you looked into this online? Can you speak to your solicitor? You need to protect your kids.

Petalpower16 Mon 10-Apr-17 07:28:44

Thank you all for your responses.

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