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Stunned that anyone could do this.

(5 Posts)
Dawndonnaagain Sun 09-Apr-17 14:03:13

Dd (20) finally got round to telling stbxh about her various overdoses yesterday. Don't know why, but she did. His response. Well, he nearly died around New Year because he took an overdose, does she want to carry on discussing Near Death experiences?
What. The. Actual. Fuck. His competitiveness knows no bounds. I knew he was self obsessed but fuck this goes beyond anything.
Apart from the fact that he knows to the last minuscule point of a gram how much he can take, this is his dd.
He's been wanting to tell her for ages, but she wouldn't ask him straight out, he just did things like wearing the hospital band for weeks afterwards, or saying he was in hospital but not what for, or saying come and visit but not when I've just got out of hospital. But she wouldn't ask him, so this is how he's done it. Fucking arse. Tried to dominate my mother's day too. Started texting her (including hospital stuff) at six in the morning.
Just sounding off. So fucking angry with him. Arse. You don't tell your kids stuff like this when they're fragile. Arse.

blue2014 Sun 09-Apr-17 14:08:36

Sorry to hear it, she doesn't need that

EmeraldIsle100 Sun 09-Apr-17 17:43:17

Dawn, my EXH did a very similar the same thing a few weeks ago to our DD aged 20 who is currently in psychiatric ward. He went to visit her and spouted on and on about his own depressive illness (made-up) and made the entire visit about him even though she has been sectioned following a series of suicide attempts. I completely get how you feel.

I feel your anger completely and am sorry that you have to put up with it at an already difficult time for yourself and your DD. Her father is a passive aggressive arsehole. As for texting your DD at that hour of the morning, well seriously, what the fuck?

My EXH is an ex for very good reasons and I left him when DD was a year old. He is a self centered bastard and although I am used to his behaviour this actually left me speechless. He only stayed in my DC lives to make himself look good. Trust me it is a very long story but that is the reality of his input in his DC's lives.

I always knew how utterly despicable he is but that latest stunt shocked me beyond belief. My DD has the measure of him and we talk about it openly. He only visits to show people what a 'caring' father he is. Luckily the nurses cottoned on to him quickly. Sadly preventing him from visiting would only give him a chance to jump on his soapbox so DD tolerates a visit 1/2 times a week. The nurses ring him to say she isn't up to a visit. Myself and family go in anytime we like.

Everyone who cares about DD and our family have kept her illness confidential because she is frightened about people knowing. We heard yesterday that he told the biggest gossip in our town all about my DD's illness. He might as well have put an article in our local paper.

If it is any help I know exactly how you feel so don't think you are alone. I hope your DD gets well soon. She knows how selfish he is and knows that you are a wonderful mother who will always support her. Take care of yourself and ignore the bastard!!!flowers

Dawndonnaagain Sun 09-Apr-17 20:18:23

Thank you EmeraldIsle flowers for you too, it's hell isn't it. I'm still so angry and trying to work out why I'm shocked, he's done similar before, in fact it's always all about him!
I hope your DD is feeling better soon.

EmeraldIsle100 Sun 09-Apr-17 23:43:36

Thank you Dawn. Sometimes a person can go even lower than you ever expect them to. I hope your DD gets the help she needs and starts to recover She stands a very good chance with a loving mum like you.

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