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Starting divorce paperwork and need help!

(22 Posts)
Glenoxo Mon 03-Apr-17 14:37:43

After all the trials and tribulations recently, I've just about completed all of the divorce paperwork to start things off (the D8 form) and am getting ready to send it in. I'd love to be able to afford a solicitor and have had a single conversation with one to talk through what the overall process is, but I've got no money and am just about maxed out already. Looks like I'll need to do this alone.

Most of it seems understandable, but I'm stuck on the section about financial orders. We are working things out between us and it all looks like we won't have any disputes; we have no assets to speak of so are simply splitting a few household items and neither of us are arguing as we agree on what's fair for both of us and what will be required for the children.

I'm asking for nothing from her other than suitable contributions to childcare costs, and she is asking for nothing from me as I'll be bringing up the children entirely until she finds a suitable house of her own. I have agreed to take on and service our joint debts (credit card, overdrafts, loans, that sort of thing) in return for her not having a claim on my future income (the clean break clause is how I've heard it described).

On the form, though, it says that if I don't apply for an order at this stage then I could be worse off later. I don't want to mess this up; should I apply for something at this stage?!

aibu1983 Mon 03-Apr-17 14:48:25

you can get a free 30 mins with a solicitor! why dont you try that x

Heatherjayne1972 Mon 03-Apr-17 17:25:27

Are you talking about the financial bit where you tick the appropriate box(es). ?
If you are it's standard to tick them all

Glenoxo Mon 03-Apr-17 17:43:13

@Heatherjayne1972 I am indeed - I haven't ticked them all yet as I didn't want to overcomplicate anything; are there no problems then if I do tick them and we manage to agree everything without the need for mediation or arbitration?

Heatherjayne1972 Mon 03-Apr-17 17:55:04

You might want to wait for someone who knows more than I but as I understand it you tick those boxes because it's easier to apply for all that now and not need it rather than not tick and have to re apply later on
If that makes sense
My solicitor seemed quite happy with me doing that when she checked out my forms

EggysMom Mon 03-Apr-17 18:00:37

On the D8 you tick all the boxes.

It's on the Financial Proceedings (a separate legal process) that you start working out who will have/pay what, and one of you will need a solicitor to draft a Consent Order.

The Wikivorce website and forum is very helpful towards people doing this without support.

NotJanine Mon 03-Apr-17 18:22:06

Just to repeat what everyone else has said - tick them all. It doesn't mean anything at this stage, it just allows you to have a consent order

PaterPower Mon 03-Apr-17 19:10:40

Yep, as pp have said - tick them all.

Get the process started and get the financial order done asap. It's what will give you the clean break. I was quoted 700 plus VAT for one (you have to have a solicitor look at it and "advise" you before it goes to the judge, which is where the cost comes in). Pretty much everything else is easy enough to do yourself.

Glad to see you're moving forward Glen.

StiffenedPleat Mon 03-Apr-17 21:00:57

Do you have pensions? Do you have children? Do you have jobs? Do you have debts?

letsmargaritatime Mon 03-Apr-17 21:51:52

I remember your other threads op, sorry it's turned out this way. Best of luck.

Princesspinkgirl Mon 03-Apr-17 22:34:16

Hi op im currently going through a online divorce! Due to cost cheaper its pretty straight forward just tick boxes as mines consented with no house owning or similar it cost me just £650

MrsBertBibby Mon 03-Apr-17 22:41:24

I'm a family solicitor.

Tick all the boxes, for children and you.

It's standard, and just means that once you have sorted out your agreement, the court can then dismiss them all.

Glenoxo Wed 05-Apr-17 14:59:29

Thanks all - we don't own our house, have debts we've built over the years (I even took on all her credit cards last year so she wouldn't need to pay the interest) and we have four kids.

I'll get those boxes ticked then and send it off. Progress is progress.

I spoke about it with her briefly the other night and pointed out that as I was divorcing her for adultery she would be liable for the costs so would need to be prepared for that. She can't understand why I'm not citing irreconcilable differences, even though she committed adultery. In her mind there's reasons she did what she did; no matter how much I tell her the courts won't care, she won't accept it.

Will be a harsh lesson for her by the looks of things!

Dontsayyouloveme Thu 06-Apr-17 21:50:31

I've just sent off my D8 form but ignored the Financial Order bit because I'll be getting a Consent Order drawn up by a solicitor. I thought the Financial Order section was just if you didn't agree finances and Court needs to decide it? Will my firm go through ok without this section ticked does anyway know?

sorry to hijack OP!

category12 Fri 07-Apr-17 06:47:13

There's no such thing as 'irreconcilable differences' in UK divorce anyway - 'unreasonable behaviour' , otoh exists, and sounds like if she wanted that she should have filed for the divorce herself.

MrsBertBibby Fri 07-Apr-17 08:06:28

No don'tsayyouloveme, you needed to have ticked them.

If your petition is returned for any reason, tick them before sending it back.

Make sure you tell the solicitor who does the consent order.

Dontsayyouloveme Fri 07-Apr-17 08:25:23

Thanks Mrs. Bugger. I know the court has sent it off now! Will tell sol like you said! Will it have any detrimental affect do you know? X

MrsBertBibby Fri 07-Apr-17 13:05:59

No, it will be fine, but it will change the forms your solicitor must complete. So they need to be aware.

MrsBertBibby Fri 07-Apr-17 13:06:26

Mrs Bugger grin

Trich Sat 08-Apr-17 00:07:22

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Dontsayyouloveme Sat 08-Apr-17 07:29:50

Mrs Bugger!! 😂😂 much appreciated. Thanks x

Dontsayyouloveme Sat 08-Apr-17 14:24:10

Mrs Bugger... 😂 The divorce petition has been received by my stbxnw and I've a copy too. Can I tick the boxes I missed off now before he sends his back? Mind you, don't think they are asking for mine back?! Thanks X x

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