Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Go fuck yourself

(43 Posts)
DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:29:56

This is what my husband just said to my 11 year old dd whilst loading his middle finger up.
Apparently she was being disrespectful.
I am so shocked and hurt.
But I am over reacting

DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:30:52

Holding

colouringinagain Sun 19-Mar-17 22:30:53

No. You are not.

sooperdooper Sun 19-Mar-17 22:32:10

Jesus Christ no, not over reacting at all, has he spoken to her like that before? Is she his biological dd?

DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:32:21

He says I am. What do I do?

DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:32:46

I hate him

flapjackfairy Sun 19-Mar-17 22:32:50

No not overeacting at all!
That is appalling from your partner. I could not live with someone who was capable of saying that to dd.
I would wonder what else he is capable of .
Hug for you and your girl xxx

TalkingofMichaelAngel0 Sun 19-Mar-17 22:32:50

A bit more context might help. But initial reaction is yanbu. Thus is her step dad?

DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:33:31

He apologised to her and apparently that is enough

Foxysoxy01 Sun 19-Mar-17 22:33:52

Wow...ok that is really not appropriate!

Yadnbu.

BillyDaveysDaughter Sun 19-Mar-17 22:34:18

To an 11 year old? Charming.

ImperialBlether Sun 19-Mar-17 22:35:09

Is she his child?

He's disgusting talking to a child like that, no matter who she is in relation to him, though.

bigbumbrunette Sun 19-Mar-17 22:36:40

If my husband did this to my daughter it'd be game over. If my husband did this to a strangers 11 yr old, it's be game over.

DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:37:56

She is his daughter.
I am in shock.
He is horrible to me but never to children.
I am making a big thing of it apparently.
I want to leave but dd birthday this week so I am in the wrong for making a if thing about it.
What should I do?

DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:41:03

Please help

FancyPantsDelacroixTheFirst Sun 19-Mar-17 22:42:46

This would have to be an exceptionally crappy, never has anything anywhere near as serious happened before, blip, (followed by a genuine, no shifting of blame, apology) to be forgivable.

If Dd was disrespectful that needs to be dealt with proportionately, but she also needs to know that he was bang out of order and you are calling him on it.

PacificDogwod Sun 19-Mar-17 22:44:55

He is horrible to me but never to children

Well, now he is.

You could get your DD out of that situation as a birthday present.

So sorry you are having to deal with an abusive husband and father thanks

FancyPantsDelacroixTheFirst Sun 19-Mar-17 22:44:57

Your dd needs to know her mum deserves respect. Much better than a birthday walking on eggshells round an arsehole.

twattymctwatterson Sun 19-Mar-17 22:45:50

Do you want this to be your life op? You say he's horrible to you, can you elaborate on that? If he's abusive it sounds like he's now starting on your DD.

FancyPantsDelacroixTheFirst Sun 19-Mar-17 22:47:24

And he deserves disrespect. I withdraw what I said about her disrespect needing to be dealt with, assuming she was actually disrespectful in the first place.

Hissy Sun 19-Mar-17 22:48:43

He is horrible to you...

He is NOW horrible to your d

Now is the time to get out

NOW!

DottyRotty Sun 19-Mar-17 22:53:18

Don't know what to do.
He has no respect forme but has been a good dad.
Son doing GCSEs I will be the one to blame
Won't be able to stay in this house sham
Have no money
Sobbing

marmitecrumpets Sun 19-Mar-17 22:55:31

Don't let your H be the model to your daughter of what a husband/father should be like

PacificDogwod Sun 19-Mar-17 22:56:42

Do you have anywhere safe you can go for a while?
Regroup?

reuset Sun 19-Mar-17 23:02:23

That's not on, OP! That's a terrible thing to say.

I thought the comment was aimed at you initially, but my response would have been similar,

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now