Don't feel I can do this...I really can't :(

[Tryingtobehappy]

Why do I feel like my world has ended. My relationship ended 4 weeks ago for reasons that my ex said he couldn't get past. We have been no contact for 3 weeks as he rang me saying he missed me/loved me but still can't get past his 'reason', so I said that it was pointless him contacting me. Now all I think about is him and wanting him to contact me but not wanting him to...if that makes sense.

He wasn't kind to me when we were together, used to say some cruel things to me and often I used to think that I didn't know who I was anymore and living someone else's life. I know if he asked me to get back with him, I wound'nt be able to because he made me miserable, though just want him to call me and tell me what a fool he's been and loves me so much. How messed up is that?

I even have conversations out loud with me saying what he would say to me and what I would say to him...I feel like I''m going crazy.

Now I'm on my own...feeling lost and don't have the energy to move on.

Help :'(

[springydaffs]

Hold on. This obsession with him will pass. It's a mix of rejection and loss of hope and the obsession that comes in the wake of what is essentially a controlling relationship.

Because he does sound controlling. I even wonder if he is further fucking with your head by doing the push/pull thing. You said you were ok until he got back in contact.. now you're a mess.

Hold on. I suspect his 'reason' is something either plucked out of the air or something very mundane ie that you are a bog standard ordinary person but he is making out you have a serious flaw that is 'impossible' to get beyond. Give me a break.

Try and grit through the longing until it passes. This man is not good for you. Imagine, you could be with someone who thinks you're wonderful and not full of flaws that are 'impossible to get beyond'.

Do the Freedom Programme. Just as a precaution.

[BoringUsername17]

I feel exactly the same OP, even though I ended the relationship. It's a grieving process. Things that have helped me are spending time with friends and doing something nice for me. Just trying to remind myself that there are still things to be happy about in life. It's still bloody hard though.