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Legal advice, what info do I need?

(7 Posts)
Nottalotta Sun 12-Mar-17 22:05:40

Hoping to get some legal advice, probably a free half hour if I can, re splitting up with husband, divorce, house etc.

Has anyone had a free session and what info do I need to provide to make best use of it?

howdiditgettothis Sun 12-Mar-17 22:28:35

I had a free half and found it really useful. If you're in a position to sort out as much as you can with your partner beforehand. I went along with a proposal of what we'd agreed. She pointed out a few more things I could 'go for' but on the whole she said the proposal looked fair. That's all I wanted to know really. Just reassurance I hadn't missed anything obvious. The divorce papers can be completed yourself. I'm also sorting out a consent form for the split of assets with an online service which is costing a fraction of what the solicitor quoted.

Nottalotta Sun 12-Mar-17 22:37:13

Thanks, I really want to know where I stand re the house, I don't think he'll agree to anything prior.

Enough101 Sun 12-Mar-17 23:25:34

Get the house valued by 3 estate agents and then average that out. Work out your total earnings, any pensions and savings you have and approximately what you think he has. Unlikely the free half hour will cover all that. Do you have kids? They will just explain to you what your options are. If your H is not likely to agree, you may need to go to court. Before you do that, you will need to go to an information session with a mediator (unless there's been abuse, then you're exempt). It can all get very expensive, so the more you can agree between yourselves thr better. Any joint savings, etc need to be factored onto thr total pot. Then,depending on whether you have kids and who they will live with, work out what you would need in terms of housing and income. Hope this helps. Good luck.

Nottalotta Sun 12-Mar-17 23:33:40

Really helpful, thank you. Two children, toddler and newborn.

No assets other than the house. I have a pension, he has nothing really. (poor work history) I will have the children. He is abusive I have come to realise. Not physically.

Enough101 Sun 12-Mar-17 23:41:34

Ok. Same situation as me then 😃 if you are having children more than him, its likely your housing needs are greater. They start 50/50 split and go from there based on need. Are you on maternity leave from a job at the min? Just get yourself an excel spreadsheet together of income vs outgoings and see what you need. He will have to pay some maintenance but this depends on whether he has children to sleep over with him and for how many nights, etc. May also have to provide spousal maintenance. Is the abuse just a recent thing since you have had the children or has it got worse since having them? Well done for recognising this and trying to remove yourself and your children from it. I would say take your time and get things sorted. Maybe try giving women's aid a call when he's out at work? They are really helpful and depending on where you are, they have one stop shops where you can go and there are solicitors, housing, counselling advice, etc all on one place so you could get some further info.

Nottalotta Mon 13-Mar-17 06:39:50

I imagine children will be with me pretty much full time. I'm on maternity leave, have to return full time but will be asking to drop some hours or will change jobs.

Re being abusive. It's as if he's two different people although for several years I've rarely sen the relaxed nice one. He's very anxious, I think he has a mh issue thar he refuses to acknowledge, not that that's an excuse for being an arsehole. Apparently others feel he's struggling to cope (second child etc) but I don't think shouting at me and punching walls is the way mist people would teal with it.

He's been loads worse since Dc2 w as born. I'm not just accepting it though which has probably made it worse.

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