My cousin's shitbag ex husband

[PlumblineBessie]

Me and my cousin used to be very close, but our lives moved apart, she got divorced as I got married and her children are older than mine and she mived away to live with her then husband. They got divorced about 8 years ago and at the time although it was sad, she said it was amicable and they stayed civil for the kids. I had heard through some mutual friends that her ex was shagging about when they were together, but she had never mentioned it so i didnt say anything, and anyway they were just rumours.
She is visiting for a big family do and looked v upset abd said that she had heard recently that her ex was sleeping with the mother of one of their child's friends, fir years while they were married. She is furious and confused. I dont know what to say, but I strongly, strongly suspect that this woman was just one of many. I dont know what to do or say.

Any advice?

[TheaSaxby]

They're separated now so it won't achieve anything if you speculate that there were more women. It'll just make her feel shitter than she does.

Be a sympathetic ear and remind her she's well out of it.

[PlumblineBessie]

Thankyiu. My instinct is to keep quiet but she is obsessing about this particular woman, when really it's likely there were tons. I feel so sad for her. She said it came out on a school mum's night out, when it was blurted as "We thought you knew about it! It was common knowledge."

The one I am almost certain of, is the ex wife of my husband's mate, who reckoned she was having a thing with someone who absolutely fitted the wanker ex husband's description, right down to the van he drove, and the fact that his wife "took the girls to her mothers most weekends." My cousin still thinks this other woman is her friend. They are on each other's fb photos.

[fridayrain]

If you are almost certain then i would tell her but don't speculate on any other women.

Surely if it was the other way round you would want to know?!