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I want to tell you that it does get better (trigger warning domestic violence)

(10 Posts)
Bluefluff Mon 27-Feb-17 22:02:15

I wanted to write this for anyone who is thinking of leaving an abusive relationship, trying to work out what's going on, trying to find inner strength, or have left and are recovering.

It does get better. I promise.

Last year I made the hardest decision of my life to leave my abusive partner. He was my so called 'childhood sweetheart'. For years I did not know he was abusive, he masked it with his charming alter ego.

Then my mental health started to deteriorate rapidly. I became very unwell. I had to leave my career that I had worked hard for as I couldn't function day to day. I became completely housebound through severe anxiety and panic.

The GP saw my bruises. She reported it to the domestic violence team. I was discussed at MARAC 3 times in 3 months, and classed as "high risk", I was told if I didn't get out I was at risk of being killed.

One day I woke up and new I couldn't take anymore. I left. If I'd have known how hard those next few days would have been I don't know if I'd have left. But I also didn't know how great my life could be without him.

It's been almost a year. I am still very poorly. But I am making progress every day.

You CAN do it. You deserve a life free from abuse. It's not easy, it will possibly be the hardest thing you will ever do. But it is worth it.

flowers for anyone going through this & for all survivors

Dontaskmegoogleit Mon 27-Feb-17 22:46:36

I'm glad you found the courage to leave. flowers
And I'm also glad you have the courage to tell others about the light at the end of the tunnel x

Valentine2 Mon 27-Feb-17 22:54:15

That's is so very brave of you. I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like when you were stuck in that place. What animals do this to other human beings. sad so lovely that you are sharing it here and giving probably many other women the courage that you have plenty of. flowers

Bluefluff Mon 27-Feb-17 23:02:10

Thank you. My thoughts were that if my experience helps just one other person out there then it wasn't all for nothing.

Bluefluff Tue 28-Feb-17 09:45:19

I've asked for this to be deleted as it's quite identifying as I used my usual username, didn't mind so much if it was going to be helpful to people but it looks like it isn't grin so if it disappears at some point that's why

Purplebluebird Tue 28-Feb-17 09:52:31

Thank you. I'm about to do the same, though it's not physical. Well done for being brave, I hope I can be as brave!

Bluefluff Tue 28-Feb-17 10:14:55

Good luck Purple, sending you strength.

user1472402339 Tue 28-Feb-17 11:48:20

Very brave is all I can say well doneflowers

tipsytrifle Tue 28-Feb-17 12:44:46

Your courage has been astounding. Your actions to save yourself also show that "waiting for the right time" isn't really it, nor is "waiting for strength/feeling better". It's more of a sudden survival impulse that isn't dancing around the fear and thought process of "what if" that can be so paralysing. Your journey, though hard, is inspirational. It might be ok to let this thread stand for awhile and see if those who need it right now will find it? I wish you all the luck in the world`- it's YOUR world now and you have made me smile. I didn't find your username or details identifiable, if that helps star

Bluefluff Tue 28-Feb-17 15:11:18

Thank you all for your lovely comments

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