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Should I walk away please help.(7 Posts)
So this is going to be a long story.
Me and my partner are from different parts of the world. We meet then broke up and he moved home then we started chatting again and he came back over things were hard he couldn't find a job and my mum wasn't sure port of my relationship so we moved away. Things were extremely hard we were in a half way house no money no food and I look for affection else where and he found out. He forgive me and we tried to get past it but then arguments came and fights became a daily thing and name calling on both sides. We finally got our own house and everything calmed down as I thought they would and we became so much happier Yeah sure sometimes there was blips and we would argue and I would say horrible things then he would and then it would get physical. I started doing everything he wanted and things got better we went on holidays still argued but never got physical again. We found out we was pregnant and had a chat about what I should do we decided to keep the baby when I was pregnant everything was back to the first time I meet him he was the loving caring person I knew. Yeah we argued with my hormones all over the place but never one did he lay a hand on me and I thought he had changed. Now I have a baby boy we doing nothing but argue and he has hit me in my legs bent my fingers back and just wore me down with his words so much last week I went to my dad's for a break we talked about it the day I left and both argued we have horrible tempers and needed some time apart. Even though I did miss him and felt guilt cos my baby boy came with me I was getting back to be happy we talked I told him I missed him he said the same so I decided to come back home on Saturday. He wasn't at all excited to see me just our baby and I could just feel the energy drain out of me being back. I feel like I walk on constant egg shells he belittled me and calls me names and just makes me feel so low he has complained for years that I don't clean the house or give him enough sex like I use to. I don't take care of my self like I use to and makes it out that it is all me I know it's not but I'm anything for a easy life so I started doing everything he ask but it's still not good enough he says I still don't do what he asks. I never wanted to have a baby brought in to this type of relationship and I honestly thought he did change I don't want my boy to be from a broken home cos I know how that feels but I don't know what else I can do. Everything in finance is in my name but he pays and we are in debt with council rent so it's not easy to get up and leave plus I could only go to my dad's and his partner hates me. I feel trapped like today he asked for sex I said Yeah just after I go for a fag I was out side having a fag and he came out saying why the fuck did you take my lighter and I asked him not to speak to me like that. That caused a argument and he said he never wanted me to come back and he will fuck off soon enough and not to talk so since 2pm he hasn't spoke to me . If it want for my little boy I wouldn't be here. I have ppd to and I feel like everything just on top of me and I have no one to turn to..
You need to leave this relationship op. If you can't do it for you then do it for your boy.
Get in touch with Women's Aid. The national helpline is 0808 2000 247 - but lines are busy during the day so try to call at night if you can. Or try your local Women's Aid during office hours, which will be your best bet. They will help, support and guide you. They are the experts.
You have described a typical cycle of abuse. this man is abusive and you need to leave him for your sake and because of your little boy.
Phone Womens Aid urgently - the PP posted the number for you.
This is really bad abuse and you need to get you and your DS out - FAST!!!
Shelter may also be able to help you with housing and understanding what might happen with your living arrangements. Just google Shelter
I agree wholeheartedly with the previous replies. You're in danger and must leave at once. Women's Aid are fantastic - through them you will find yourself in the hands of an amazing network of organisations who will move heaven and earth to help you. Please don't delay. Don't wait. Don't mull it over. Get out. You can weigh up pros and cons to your heart's content once you're safe. I know you think we've got it wring and were exaggerating the danger but we haven't. We're right, I promise. Get out and think about practicalities later. Don't tell him you're leaving. Don't tell him you're considering leaving. Just go.
He is an abusive monster. Get out now and don't look back, no matter what he says because it will all be lies, anyway.
Perfect post, Polidori. Listen to her op xx
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