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Middle of the worst.

(19 Posts)
ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 03:18:36

Almost a week in after a break up. Every night I wake up and it hits me like a train. Any tips?

I have a double shift at work tomorrow. DC are fast asleep. I want to scream sad

NewView Sat 25-Feb-17 03:40:17

Do you want to talk about it?
Sorry you're going through this. Don't go to work if you're not fit to be there and might make mistakes. Get a cup of tea and read something really boring. If you can't sleep lying in the dark thinking in circles really doesn't help. Consider seeing your GP for some (short term) medication to help you sleep.

ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 03:56:28

Thanks NewView. Cup of yes has been made. I'm a full time student so I managed to have a few days off. I also work at the weekend, today I made myself do as much as possible so I plan to do that again today. I can handle the days, it's the nights that are horrible.

He wants to talk now but won't say why. It's messing with my head. My dc aren't his, I've got through a messier break up. It's so raw. I have a busy schedule the next few weeks. That will be my saving grace. I want to scream just now.

ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 03:58:42

I've been on meds before. I'm a single parent so that puts me off taking them again. They make me sleepy

Inexperiencedchick Sat 25-Feb-17 04:11:49

You can do this. You need to have a proper sleep if you have a double shift tomorrow and if you are going to work. It will get better. 💐
Really sorry you are having this.

ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 04:22:56

Thanks InexperiencedChick. I just want it over with. As NewView said booking him would be the best option. I can't seem to bring myself to keep to that though. I want to handle it better. I'll get there

Kevinbaconsrealwife Sat 25-Feb-17 04:30:18

Thinking of you and sending you virtual support and hugs....the middle of the night is always an absolute bastard in times of grief/ sadness/ illness....be good to yourself and do whatever you need to do to get through the coming weeks and months....x

ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 04:36:49

Thanks Kevin, I'm going for an op in the next few weeks too which will leave me having to rely on others for 6 weeks. No mention of this now he's decided to fuck off. Not that I'd want him there now. Just an acknowledgement would have done fine. You think you know someone!

ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 04:38:08

Seems my spelling is shit! I'm crying a lot. Thank you all. smile

ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 05:23:51

I'll get the last couple of hours before the kids are awake. I want to scream and cry at him. There is no point in doing that.

SparklingRaspberry Sat 25-Feb-17 10:33:10

Hope you're okay OP flowers

cafenoirbiscuit Sat 25-Feb-17 10:51:33

How old are your kids ? Can they entertain themselves while you have a power nap if you need one?
Things WILL get better - every day is a day nearer to when that happens.

Dontsayyouloveme Sat 25-Feb-17 11:50:36

Going through something similar and it's bloody awful. I listen to podcasts at night and they do send me to sleep after 10-15 mins. Try that when you wake up in the night... maybe after you've had a cry to get it out of your system! Big hug flowers

ShootFruit Sat 25-Feb-17 13:28:34

My kids are 2 & 8 they've gone to their dads and I'm sitting here in a course wondering why the hell im here. I'm not taking anything in.

I have another course a week Monday away from home. I'm dreading it.

I want to be happy. SXP doesn't give a flying fuck

cantwaitforsummertimeeeeeee Sat 25-Feb-17 13:43:02

Hi

I'm 3 weeks in to my breakup and I posted the night he left
So I know exactly what you are going through and how it feels
I couldn't eat, sleep, not stop thinking about it but 3 wks on and I'm having some good moments then sad moments
I think I've cried every day for 2 was but I'm not crying as much and I feel I'm getting stronger
I've lost 7lbs and my appetite went but I feel it coming back slightly
I still feel empty and lost BUT not AS painful. I've been posting lots on here and talking to a handful of friends I can trust and I can honestly say I can see the light at the end of the tunnel
When I was with my ex I totally lost myself. I have low self esteem I felt worthless...I'm actually looking forward to getting happier and even with my weight loss which I knows down to stress I'm trying to see myself in a different light and looking after myself and more importantly my little girl
Sending hugs xx

ShootFruit Sun 26-Feb-17 07:45:05

Can'tWait I'm so sorry to hear that. I fell into bed shattered last night after a long day. It's when you wake and have to start remembering everything. To be honest now a week on it doesn't seem so raw, the emotions are crazy. I wish I could stop them.

If I lost anymore weight I would disappear so I'm forcing myself to eat. I've been to the docs loads of times and they say I'm fine it's just my metabolism. To be fair pre kids I was thin as hell. I hate hearing people tell me I've lost so much weight am I ok?!.... Yes I'm great thanks hmm.

What have you done in the last 3 weeks to help yourself? I'm at a loss of what to do

cantwaitforsummertimeeeeeee Mon 27-Feb-17 07:14:22

Shootfruit

To be honest it sounds cliche
But I'm literally taking each day as it comes. Like Mondays I go food shopping and I do a food planner for the week so just sitting writing a list for all yummy food for the week for me and lo is something positive. Then I try make something fun for lo
Even if is when we get home let's watch a DVD with some popcorn or sweeties and just do something out of the routine as I'm very structured with my routine which helps but also it's fun for lo to do something out of the routine.
When lo is in bed I literally try do something that will relax me
So I'll do a face pack or the other day o brought some tanning lotion
One you can use in the shower
Or paint my nails. I've found that doing these small things actually make me feel a little bit better !
It could be anything but my point is setting yourself a task or a treat then enjoying that moment. I try block off as much as I can as I tend to over think. My ex contacted me yesterday multiple times and I just found the strength to ignore them as I know once I text back I'm in his claw
How are you feeling today ? Xx

ShootFruit Mon 27-Feb-17 11:16:40

I've managed to turn a corner. I'm not sure how long it will last. I've cut contact. I don't miss him. I feel numb though. I don't want to scream at him anymore,I don't want to talk. I don't care if he's made a mistake, I don't care if he's hurting.

Thank you for your reply, it's comforting to talk

cantwaitforsummertimeeeeeee Tue 28-Feb-17 10:55:11

Hi
How are you feeling today ?

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