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Ive been dumped

(72 Posts)
EveryoneLovesDogs Fri 24-Feb-17 12:40:11

Just that. Bf told me he doesnt want to be with a single parent. It took him six months to tell me

Bones17 Fri 24-Feb-17 12:43:27

What a knob. I'm sorry. X

PurpleDaisies Fri 24-Feb-17 12:44:34

Sorry to hear that. At least you know now but it's never nice breaking up with someone. flowers

I'd read the single parent thing as an excuse rather than the real reason to be honest. As you say, why would he suddenly decide after six months?

SoleBizzz Fri 24-Feb-17 12:44:53

User!!! You'll realise you don't want to be with him either! !

peggyundercrackers Fri 24-Feb-17 12:50:33

sometimes things done work out, that's just the way relationships work. I wouldn't over analyse it, 6 months isn't a long time really.

DramaAlpaca Fri 24-Feb-17 12:51:53

Oh I'm sorry, that's upsetting flowers

EveryoneLovesDogs Fri 24-Feb-17 13:00:00

Im better off alone i think

TheNaze73 Fri 24-Feb-17 13:04:02

If it wasn't right for either of you, then it's better to know sooner than later. At least today is the start of the rest of your life smile

SoleBizzz Fri 24-Feb-17 13:19:59

You're better off taking time to restablish a routine in your life where you are busy and don't need him to fill spare time. You are better off introducing something new into your life. Try meet up fir example. Here in Birmingham there is a Heartbreak group meeting every four weeks on a Saturday in Kings Heath. I haven't been buy plenty go. Costs about £3 contribution. There are lots of groups on meet up. Distract yourself. Do stuff to improve you. Go swimming? This sort if thing will put your mind at rest.

ShatnersWig Fri 24-Feb-17 14:35:15

Bones I don't think you can automatically say "He's a knob" based on such little info. Maybe he had never dated a parent before? It is a very different dynamic from dating someone without kids. If it's new to someone, it can be incredibly daunting and, sometimes, frustrating- not seeing someone very often due to babysitting issues, cancelling regularly because child is ill or has a problem the parent needs to stay and sort out etc, not being able necessarily to go away for a romantic weekend. All manner of things. And that would be the same whether it's a man dumping single parent or a woman dumping a single parent. It's incompatibility and until you try, you can't know. And sometimes it takes months to realise that it just isn't for you.

JustSpeakSense Fri 24-Feb-17 14:38:52

I'm sorry.

Maybe he needed 6 months to see if he could make it work with a single parent, but has come to realise it's not working for him.

At least it didn't take him a year (or longer!)

You are now free to find someone better, chin up flowers

SparklingRaspberry Fri 24-Feb-17 14:50:19

So sorry to hear that OP

He sounds awful though. You deserve much better flowers

ShatnersWig Fri 24-Feb-17 15:01:22

Sparkling Why does he sound awful? Serious question.

BeMorePanda Fri 24-Feb-17 15:12:23

Shatners are you the XBF? grin

Or on drugs/half term?

When someone is sad about being dumped, other people saying he a knob, his loss etc is a perfectly acceptable & soothing response to the person who was dumped.

SherlockStones Fri 24-Feb-17 15:19:20

BeMorePanda

More like juvenile than "perfectly acceptable".

ShatnersWig Fri 24-Feb-17 15:21:50

No, I've never taken drugs, nor am I still at school.

I think it's fine to say "His loss". Or to say what peggy and Naze said.

I think it's fine to say "There are loads and loads of guys out there for whom you being a single mum won't be a problem at all" which I suspect may well be what the OP wants to hear, that she's going to be on her own for years and years because no man wants a single mum. Maybe some reassurance?

I genuinely don't think if a single dad came on here with the same OP people would say he'd been "used" (as per *Sole) by the woman than dumped him because he was a single parent.

I just don't see why we have to say people are "knobs" or "awful", that's all. The vast majority of us will dumped or been dumped. It is what it is.

ShatnersWig Fri 24-Feb-17 15:23:05

That should of course read "...which I suspect may well be what the OP wants to hear, not to feel that she's going to be on her own for years and years because no man wants a single mum."

BeMorePanda Fri 24-Feb-17 16:49:52

Ah you're the Thread Police
<bows>

Nomoreworkathome Fri 24-Feb-17 17:29:56

Why is he a knob Bones?
It's always hard OP but you will be ok. It sounds like he gave it a good go. I had one like that. It just wasn't for him.

ArchNotImpudent Fri 24-Feb-17 18:13:12

I'm sorry to hear you've been dumped. It does sound as though, whatever his reasons were, he expressed them tactlessly - but at least he left in a straightforward way rather than ghosting you or having an affair. I hope you'll be able to move on and find someone who's comfortable with a partner who has children.

EveryoneLovesDogs Fri 24-Feb-17 18:27:38

I was meant to stay over at his last Saturday but had to come home because DS was upset. I struggle to find time to date anyway i work full time

Sammygold Fri 24-Feb-17 18:30:49

Sorry to hear, OP. It's shit being dumped. You will experience in time that it'll open up the opportunity for you to meet someone who is happy to have your child in their lives. That said, all this talk of the guy being 'awful' or a 'knob' is just patronising nonsense.

HotNatured Fri 24-Feb-17 20:19:15

Why is he a knob? He was honest, I would respect him for that. Everyone has the right to extricate themselves from a relationship that isn't working for them at any time they wish.

OP being dumped is shit flowers

scottishdiem Fri 24-Feb-17 20:31:41

I think he was less knob and more honest man. Being dumped isn't a pleasant experience but there are a lot more worse ways to end a relationship. If the OPs DS being upset was annoying to him then its better that this is found out now rather than becoming a problem much further down the line.

Good luck OP, there are other men out there.

LesisMiserable Sat 25-Feb-17 00:41:17

Sounds like he's been honest and fair.

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