Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Breaking up...

(11 Posts)
Soheresthething Wed 22-Feb-17 19:46:30

Hi, Just wondered if anyone who's gone through this has any advice? I have been with my husband for 13 years, we have 2 children. I just don't feel I can stay with him any more, I have felt like this for a long time and have finally had the courage to say. I have told him and we are separating. The things I'm worried about are the children and how they will cope and financially what I can do. I currently work part time and don't earn much and even less over holidays and while I can up my hours a bit, I will have to get tax credits and maybe housing benefit to stay in the house (rented), even then I'm not sure I would meet the rent. I have tried to apply for a council house, but not sure how that would work or how long that takes. Anyone been in a similar situation?

sproutsmum Wed 22-Feb-17 20:05:45

Sorry you are feeling this way , I'm afraid I don't have any advice to give , I could have written this post myself , our situations are so similar. I hope someone will be along soon with some ideas , I'll be waiting to see what they suggest too, I'm sure it will,be ok in the end.

Hutch2017 Wed 22-Feb-17 21:55:10

Have you checked your possible entitlements on the tax credits website? Or entitledto.com? If it looks like they won't cover ur rent, is finding somewhere cheaper an option?
Not surewhat custody arrangements you have agreed with your ex but he will have to pay maintenance for the children too!

ShaniaTwang Thu 23-Feb-17 01:33:43

With housing benefit, child maintenance, tax credits and salary you could be OK - but h will need to leave and be OK with that obviously. The children will cope because their home will be without tension, and financially you will need to budget carefully and monitor what you spend. Best of luck with your new life flowers

Soheresthething Thu 23-Feb-17 22:39:38

Thanks for your replies. I'll have a look on entitledto. It looks like I will get tax credits, but the rent is £200 over LHA, so not sure how that works. He said he would move out, but he said he can't afford anything to rent except a room where the kids can't stay over. The rent for our house is a lot less than everything else in the area and kids are in school here, so don't want to move them. Thank you it is quite daunting.

Hutch2017 Fri 24-Feb-17 09:33:23

Unfortunately you would have to make up that £200 yourself then. Remember though, he HAS to pay maintenance for the children so factor that into what you will receive each month. If he tries to say he can't afford it, go straight to the CSA. Especially if he isn't having them overnight, you would get the maximum amount (depending on his salary).
It is daunting but try to think of the long term benefits!

Soheresthething Sun 26-Feb-17 09:25:32

Thanks, I'm just a bit confused about how I'd do that. It seems like with benefits everything you earn knocks your benefits down by that amount, so if I earn the extra £200/ get it in Child Maintenance, I would get £200 less in benefits, therefore never managing to meet the rent. What I would be entitled to seems also to vastly differ depending on the calculator I look on. We're still discussing but probably 50:50.

TeenageCentaurMortificado Sun 26-Feb-17 11:36:23

Child maintenance doesn't have any bearing on benefits you are entitled to as far as I am aware.

KatieScarlett Sun 26-Feb-17 13:11:57

Child maintenance does not count.

Soheresthething Tue 28-Feb-17 12:08:14

Ok great, that might make it possible then. Thank you for all your help.

Crappyatnames Tue 28-Feb-17 23:01:30

flowers hi, I'm going through a similar situation- separated from DH of 11years in Dec. I didn't know where to start but found speaking to my GP, citzens advice and local council helped. My local council provide a housing options service where they give you a pretty accurate idea of the benefits you're entitled to - I found this very helpful.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now