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Online Dating when you have health issues/disability

(10 Posts)
GanderSauce Wed 22-Feb-17 10:52:07

Do you disclose straight away? Or wait till date no. 1 or 2?

I don't like putting too much personal information on a Profile, which can basically be seen by the world!

Any thoughts?

pocketsaviour Wed 22-Feb-17 12:33:17

I would put it in your profile, otherwise I think you'll waste time with shallow fuckers who would be put off.

You don't need to go into detail - just something like "I have some minor health issues which prevent me from doing any extreme sports but I do love to get out for walks" or whatever is appropriate.

Dogblep Wed 22-Feb-17 13:20:49

I don't put it in my profile. I do disclose it if I get chatting to someone before going on a date (unless I just want something casual then it's irrelevent really. But casual doesn't really suit me)

It's quite a good idiot filter and i've had 3 particularly bad experiences revealing it on either the 1st or 2nd date which utterly crushed me. So I don't risk putting myself through that now. You'd be surprised how few men are phased by it really although of course it's still an issue to discuss and work around.

It is hard but there are nice guys out there who see past it.

OnionKnight Wed 22-Feb-17 13:27:35

I put it in my profile, fortunately my now wife didn't care about it when she read it, she actually thought my disability would be worse than it is and it still didn't bother her. Even before I met my wife, I'd been out on dates with women etc who knew about my disability beforehand.

I don't have any evidence but I personally think by putting your disability online it weeds out the idiots.

Thinkingofausername1 Wed 22-Feb-17 18:57:42

I don't think you should as it doesn't define who you are as a person. Let them meet you first. If they react badly; their loss

Dieu Wed 22-Feb-17 19:07:03

I would mention it. Same way as I tell people on my profile that I'm curvy (i.e. overweight grin ), and best not to reply if they prefer skinny women. Saves my time being wasted, or theirs.
Of course, I am not comparing the two, but the others are right in that it weeds out the more shallow end of the spectrum!
Also, meeting for the first time in real life can be nerve-wracking enough, without worrying about their reaction if springing something on them. Best that everyone is prepared and happy with what is on the table.

user128057 Wed 22-Feb-17 19:14:16

I always used to mention it on my profile when I did online dating

GanderSauce Fri 24-Feb-17 11:08:12

Thanks for responses, and different views. All have their good points. Will ponder more ... I think "weeding out idiots" is a good reason, but I also have my privacy to think of especially in the big sites like PoF.

Tbh, part of me is not even sure re. dating, but we shall see (a coffee date next week)

SeaCabbage Fri 24-Feb-17 11:37:53

HI Gander. I can empathise about privacy and personally I wouldn't put it on my profile.

Once you get chatting to someone online that you feel you would like to meet then maybe that would be a good time to mention it. Then you may have invested some time "chatting" but at least not met up yet.

They could ask any questions they have, not face to face, which might be easier at that point and then as you say, any shallow people would be weeded out but hopefully as you have made some sort of connection, they will look at the bigger picture.

Good luck smile

GanderSauce Fri 24-Feb-17 11:40:21

Thanks smile

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