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Paranoia / porn

(7 Posts)
ktbubs Fri 10-Feb-17 11:50:32

Hi ladies - first time pregnancy, 15 weeks along eeeek exciting. Been reading some of your threads which are really comforting but would like to share specific scenario...my husband and I have been together 10 years, very healthy sex life, he's never given me any indication he planned to cheat and has never seemed remotely capable of that...we would both comment on an attractive woman, watch the odd bit of porn together now and then when in the mood smile

This is why I don't understand why I'm so paranoid now...I've seen on internet history he has watched porn alone a few times over the years, nothing excessive and nothing to really bother me. But since I've become pregnant, we're only having sex maybe once per week lately and I've seen he has been viewing porn after he leaves for work (he drives a lorry so the thought of him doing this in his car is bothering me...WHY?!)

His cousin and friend are also neandrathals and while scrolling through his photo gallery recently looking at photos he took of a recent holiday, I saw loads of short pornographic videos his male cousin has been sending him on Whatsapp...that creeps me out a bit. I suppose my body is changing and I've always been fit and happy in my skin, confident he was attracted to me. Now I'm feeling a bit more like he's looking at me like a mumsy figure...and this porn thing is really fuelling that he doesn't see me as a 'sex-symbol' if you will anymore. Please tell me this paranoia passes! Should I bring up to him that his cousin's videos creep me out? I don't want to be the type to check his message but my stomach has been in knots with the possibilities....

Hassled Fri 10-Feb-17 11:53:31

If it's making you feel uncomfortable (especially the creepy videos) then you should absolutely say something. It probably hasn't occurred to him that while your body is changing and your hormones are everywhere you're feeling quite vulnerable, and that you need some reassurance which you're not getting that from him at the moment. Just talk to him before it becomes a huge issue that festers.

ILoveCheeseMoreThanYou Fri 10-Feb-17 12:03:03

My DH is scared shitless of my 20weeks body, especially my now ginormous boobs. He's always scared he's hurting me and I find it's always me making the first move now. Maybe your guy is similar and resorting to porn instead? I also wouldn't worry about stuff he's being sent as that isn't his fault. Talk to him and be honest!

AnyFucker Fri 10-Feb-17 12:06:31

You do realise your husband is also a neanderthal ? Judge him by the company he keeps.

If I had a quid for every "I am OK with porn, but....." I would be a very rich woman.

Adora10 Fri 10-Feb-17 12:12:32

Tell him you are feeling vulnerable and you don't want to find his porn or even like that his cousins are sending him sexual videos, you are allowed to object OP, he doesn't have a free run to do whatever he likes if it's offending or hurting you.

I can't understand some men that have to watch porn all the time, it's minging, imo of course.

picklemepopcorn Fri 10-Feb-17 12:15:00

He's having a sex life without you, which would bother me.

I don't like the sound of the cousins videos, that sounds a bit gross.

TheNaze73 Fri 10-Feb-17 18:08:21

Tell him that it bothers you

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