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DS dad wants contact after 11 years...is there a script

(2 Posts)
Dreadfulidea Tue 07-Feb-17 16:24:47

Also posted on Lone Parents board but want traffic
Was in a relationship with the guy for a number of years. I found out I was pregnant after we split up ( he had a new girlfriend). Understandably we were both in shock ( he also said it probably wasn't his) and he moved away with said girlfriend never to be seen again. None of his family had any further contact either and I have no idea what has happened to any of them. I got in touch with the CSA when DS was seven and got the DNA test done through them and unluckily for him a monthly payment. I have only ever told DS the positives about his father and the good relationship we used to have because I didn't see the point of doing anything else.
Got a message on Facebook via a friend of a friend saying he would like to see DS now.
So far so predictable. What happens next? DS says he isn't bothered to meet him but I'm thinking he probably should at some point. Anyone got an idea about how this pans out?

karmassidekick Tue 07-Feb-17 16:30:33

Don't fret it until he actually has the balls to contact you himself. Which judging by his past behaviour might not happen. I wouldn't even worry about it until then. If/when he contacts you, you see what he says and let your son decide. I'm guessing he's not bothered as he doesn't miss what he's never known, what would you hope your son to gain from a relationship with this man that's a stranger to him?

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