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Why would he say this?

(8 Posts)
Hurtandconfused22 Sat 04-Feb-17 11:00:20

Been with DP for nearly 3 years. Our first baby is due any day. Always had a great relationship, he's a wonderful man and I've always considered myself lucky to have met him. If you met him, you'd understand that he seems the last person to lie, cheat,etc.

Since I've been pregnant, for various reasons, we've only had sex 3 or 4 times, the last being several months ago. He's always seemed so understanding, never put pressure on me. I know that he master bates which has never bothered me.

Anyway, last night we were on our way home from shopping when he just randomly said "I've had sex" in a somewhat joking manner. He then started back tracking saying he has no idea why he said that, meant to say he wants to have sex with me and he's just tired. Up until this point, I've never had any reason not to trust him. Ever. But now I'm going over things in my head. He's finished work an hour or so late a handful of times over the course of our relationship but one day last week, he didn't get home until 11pm. At the time, I thought nothing of it as he's a manager and he said a project hadn't been sent to a client by the deadline because of someone's error. Totally believe able in the nature of his job. But now I'm here racking my brains, wondering if he has been unfaithful.

I'm heavily pregnant, feeling very insecure about my body and the way I've been looking lately. He's always assured me that he adores me, loves me and thinks I'm beautiful for carrying his child. He's so excited about becoming a dad and been very attentive throughout my pregnancy.

After last night, I just don't know what to think. I've barely slept. He's apologised profusely for saying it, and is adamant that he has not cheated and would never throw our relationship away like that. He's offered his phone, work phone, iPad to check his texts, emails and social media to prove he's not done anything.

In my heart of hearts, I want to believe he's been faithful and it was just a slip of the tongue but I still can't get my head straight. What would you think?

PleasantPhesant Sat 04-Feb-17 11:11:45

I think it was a slip of the tongue. He's offered up his phone etc and if had something to hide I doubt he would have done this.

One mn posted the other week her dp had took his phone and laptop to the chippy when she had confronted him-now that's dodgy behaviour!

And I've told the guy on the phone at Scottish Hydro I loved him when I went to end the call! It just came out-I have no idea who he is.

I think it was a slip of the tongue. Good luck with your baby

Emboo19 Sat 04-Feb-17 11:22:18

I'd think he was probably a bit nervous about broaching the lack of sex, he's tried to go for a lighthearted approach, probably so as not to pressure you, but messed it up!
If you've no other concerns I wouldn't worry.
Maybe just a conversation about the lack of sex and that you appreciate him being understanding, but it's ok for him to talk to you about it.

IateallthePies654 Sat 04-Feb-17 11:51:13

It really sounds like a slip of the tongue, I've said many silly things,especially if a bit nervous or anxious.

Enjoy your pregnancy!

TheNaze73 Sat 04-Feb-17 12:02:10

Slip of the tongue, no more than that. I bet he's really wanting it, over thinking what he's going to try to say & ballsed up

Finola1step Sat 04-Feb-17 12:06:14

Slip of the tongue. I would put money on him reading that if you go overdue, having sex can be a great way to encourage labour to start. He is probably hoping you go over...

Hurtandconfused22 Sat 04-Feb-17 12:27:42

Thank you for your replies.

We spoken on a few occasions about our sex life as I've wanTed to reassure him that I'm still attracted to him, just between tiredness, constant backache etc, my sex drive is at an all time low. I actually miss sex and look forward to reigniting it once baby is here. We still have lots of affection.

Logically, I know it's unlikely that's he's cheated. He always leaves his phones around the house and I know the passwords so can easily look, plus I often use his iPad for things and sometimes access his FB account to constact certain people (he's fully aware, I always ask and has never been an issue because I don't want my own FB account but it's guaranteed these couple of people will reply as they're always on FB). It's not like there's lots of secrecy and dodgy behaviour. And he rarely goes out. I often encourage him to see his mates as I like having the place to myself some nights. He either goes to a friends house for a gaming session or to the cinema with them. I'm mates with his friends as well and they're all really decent. Also, a couple have told me since we've been together that they're really glad he met me, we're so good together and he's always wanted to part of a family (partner, house, children, family weekend activities, the whole nine yards) so would never do anything to jeprodise that.

He also knows my hatred of cheating after a married family member of mine had an inappropriate relationship with a work colleague in the past.

Guess I'm just reading into things because I'm so tired and weepy from pregnancy hormones at the moment.

Thank you for letting me get things off my chest. I don't want to discuss this with family or friends IRL.

JustSpeakSense Sun 05-Feb-17 09:05:17

It really sounds like a slip of the tongue.

He is probably concerned about your sex life atm, keep communicating openly with each other, sex lives often do take a 'hit' when pregnant, and having babies, but you will regain what you have lost, don't worry.

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