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Should I be worried about this?

(31 Posts)
MischiefManagedAlways Fri 27-Jan-17 23:04:50

My DP had a work conference in London yesterday and was away all day. There was a free bar and by the sounds of it everyone was drinking from the morning until at least 3 or 4 am.

We went out for dinner tonight and toward the end of the evening he told me that he got chatting to a women from another company and it started off innocent enough. Halfway through their conversation, after both establishing they were in relationships the women said to him, 'what happens on the conference stays at the conference' and leaned in to kiss him.

Now my DP swears he didn't kiss her and leaned back and said no. But he did admit to thinking about it and said that the consequences of the kiss made him think is it worth it?

This probably seems like a non event but I feel hurt and sad that he even thought about it. So should I just forget about this?

ivykaty44 Fri 27-Jan-17 23:09:22

If a man, a very attractive man leant in to kiss you, would you think about it for a split second?

I know I would but like your spouse I live my DP so wouldn't want to kiss

pinkandstripey Sat 28-Jan-17 00:42:19

He's covering his tracks in case someone says something to you.

TheStoic Sat 28-Jan-17 00:44:55

My first thoughts are that it DID go slightly further, he did feel very admitted to a fraction of it to get it off his chest.

Be prepared for 'mentionitis' of that woman to set in.

Lillygolightly Sat 28-Jan-17 00:57:49

Well he could just be being very honest with you, is he usually such an honest person?

He could have been expecting some sort of praise? The same praise you might expect for getting for not breaking your diet by resisting the temptation of the chocolate bar. As in look, I've been a good boy I could have cheated but I didn't, aren't you lucky! what are you going to give me a treat since I been so good?

Or it could be the beginnings of something. For now if I were you I wouldn't necessarily see it at its worst case, and I wouldn't get too stressed over it, but I would certainly keep my eye on it.

I hope that helps.

ghostwatch Sat 28-Jan-17 01:05:22

None of it sounds particularly good. I would be wary.

TyneTeas Sat 28-Jan-17 01:18:32

Only you know your husband but if I was at a conference and chatting to a delegate and that had happened I can imagine backing off and having a similar conversation later with my dh. Not that it would mean i had seriously considered it , more why I hadn't and why

But definitely worth keeping an eye on...

junebirthdaygirl Sat 28-Jan-17 09:24:49

My friend had this with her dp. He came home and told her straight away. He was genuine. I think l would just believe him if he has no history of cheating or messing around.

MischiefManagedAlways Sat 28-Jan-17 09:27:41

Thank you for all your replies.

He is genuinely an honest person and I've never had any issues with him before. I'll probably just see if anything else is mentioned over the next few days.

Thanks all.

Onemorewonthurt Sat 28-Jan-17 09:35:06

Who's idea was it to go out for dinner? Do you usually go out for meals?

LetThereBePeace Sat 28-Jan-17 09:35:07

I would take him at his word unless you have any more reasons to doubt he was being truthful. And be happy that he's secure enough with you to tell you about it straight away.

MischiefManagedAlways Sat 28-Jan-17 09:36:31

It was a joint decision to go out and we do go out for meals fairly regularly.

LesisMiserable Sat 28-Jan-17 09:39:40

I think he's does exactly what we all say we all want - been honest.

ghostwatch Sat 28-Jan-17 10:25:48

What is you women's intuition op ?
We can pick up on the subtle emotional messages being sent usually ? Are you feeling trust or something not fitting right. I hope he has been true to you

fulberoo Sat 28-Jan-17 10:27:13

*What is you women's intuition op ?
We can pick up on the subtle emotional messages being sent usually ?*


GinIsIn Sat 28-Jan-17 10:40:00

This happened to me - a colleague drunkenly kissed me at a work do. I told my DH the second I got home, in fact I woke him up to do so, because I never keep anything from him and wanted to be honest with him straight away. I told him exactly what had happened, and what I had said to my colleague. Not because I was covering my tracks but because I don't have secrets from my DH and would want him to be honest with me if the roles were reversed.

SparklingRaspberry Sat 28-Jan-17 11:44:13

Maybe he's just being honest with you?

If he didn't mention it to you and you found out another way, or if he waited a few months/years and then mentioned it, that would also be wrong.

Don't get me wrong I'd feel upset, but I would want to know.

TheNaze73 Sat 28-Jan-17 11:59:32

It happens at conferences sadly. I think he was being honest

Thinkingofausername1 Sat 28-Jan-17 15:20:57

This is what makes me angry about these types of things. These types of women think they can get away with anything, because they are in a high position. I think you should be glad he has told you but keep an eye out in the next few weeks.

BrieAndChilli Sat 28-Jan-17 15:26:03

Everyone if they are honest has thought about someone else, even for a fleeting second. If an attractive interesting person pays you attention it is natural to be flattered and enjoy it. The crunch comes when it's time to take it further. Most people would then back away no harm done once they realised things were going too far.

IamNotDarling Sat 28-Jan-17 15:36:37

Sounds genuine to me. Keep a watching brief.

MischiefManagedAlways Sat 28-Jan-17 15:41:51

Well he showed me a picture of the women, his thinking behind it would be that I could see she wasn't his type. hmm

ghostwatch Sat 28-Jan-17 17:53:31

What's your nasty point fulb ? Is there something wrong in asking what her women's intuition is ? Sometimes it helps to stop and take notice ? I think this is relevant.

jeaux90 Sat 28-Jan-17 17:58:01

Because there is no such thing as women's intuition. It's not a special power we have.

I also don't get the point about these "high women" what on earth is that about?

OP it sounds like he was being honest. A lot worse goes on at the conferences.

Happybunny19 Sat 28-Jan-17 18:05:12

I'd believe him under the circumstances. You say he's generally trustworthy and honest, and put in an awkward position by this woman. I think you have a good one there.

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