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I feel so sad

(12 Posts)
Whysonegativebepositive Mon 23-Jan-17 21:18:07

I had a massive argument with my DP last night who was very drunk. He decided to call me every name under the sun and in the process he upset our DD who is nearly one.

This is not the first time this has happened. DD was so upset she was crying uncontrollably, I had to get her out so I left and went to my mums in the freezing cold and fog I may add.

When DD was first born he had attachment issues which he has overcome but he still refuses to help me with the day to day things nappy changing feeding etc he thinks cause he is the bread winner that is enough.

I am so frustrated and last night was the final straw I actually don't think I love him anymore because of the way he has been treating me over the last year.

I feel so sad inside as this is not the man I fell in love with several years ago

He tried calling last night to apologise but I refused to take the call then he sent me a load of messages saying sorry little too late as far as I'm concerned.
I spoke to him today and told him I'm not coming back my DD comes first. She was traumatised by last nights events I couldn't even leave the room she was in she kept crying and calling for me and had the most restless night of sleep.

Blossomdeary Mon 23-Jan-17 21:20:21

I do not blame you for feeling sad - but you have done the right thing in putting your child first - that is what mothers must do.

AnyFucker Mon 23-Jan-17 21:20:56

"Attachment issues" ?

My translation of that is he is a lazy, selfish, fuckwitted manchild

And you need to protect your dd from an abusive upbringing. You are doing the right thing to end it.

BitOutOfPractice Mon 23-Jan-17 21:21:54

Your DP had attachment issues? What do you mean by that?

AnyFucker Mon 23-Jan-17 21:24:24

Is it like he had "postnatal depression" ?

(the " " marks are deliberate)

Whysonegativebepositive Mon 23-Jan-17 21:27:13

When DD was born he found it difficult to bond with her think it's from his own upbringing and the stuff he went through as a child ended up in care etc etc he has loads of issues he needs to deal with he was seeing a counsellor for a period of time but obviously wasn't long enough

Whysonegativebepositive Mon 23-Jan-17 21:28:41

I've tried to support him and we've been together for a longtime and it hasn't been all bad but since having DD which we both planned everything has gone pear shaped I think at first he felt a bit pushed out but that's no excuse man up

Whysonegativebepositive Mon 23-Jan-17 21:29:54

Yeah anyfucker I think you could be right

Violetcharlotte Mon 23-Jan-17 21:32:17

So sorry to read this, it must have been very frightening and upsetting for both you and your little one. He doesn't sound like a nice man at all flowers

ClaudiaNaughton Mon 23-Jan-17 21:34:27

Unforgivable to traumatise a baby under a year old or indeed any age. Keep away until "he sorts his issues out".

MsGameandWatch Mon 23-Jan-17 21:39:05

Your poor little girl and you.

My ex behaved like this many times but not usually in front of the children. He finally did it in front of my DS who was aged 5 at the time. My little boy was pulling him away from me and shouting at him trying to protect me. That's when I knew it was totally over. I could never allow my child to have to deal with that again.

You're brave and wonderful to get your little girl out and away. Don't go back.

AnyFucker Mon 23-Jan-17 21:56:42

You cannot and could not ever rescue him from a fucked up childhood. They are his responsibility to seek help for

Don't taint your own daughter's life by trying to support him. He will bring you all down if you let him

Let him seek help to be a better Co parent. Away from you and dd.

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