Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

I don't know what to do

(13 Posts)
Katieanna Sun 22-Jan-17 20:19:02

DP is hard work and I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm going mad.
He's told me all he does is give and gets nothing back but he's refusing to tell me what he means or how I can put it right. He's acting like nothing has happened even though I've told him I feel insecure. Apparently his word that I shouldn't feel like that should be good enough. I feel sick. Sorry, my head is such a mess

booksandcoffee Sun 22-Jan-17 20:22:29

Sorly to hear that you are having such a shit time. Have you considered going to Relate together for some counselling?

booksandcoffee Sun 22-Jan-17 20:23:05


booksandcoffee Sun 22-Jan-17 20:23:46


Queenie87 Sun 22-Jan-17 20:24:50

No way he'd do that, I can't give any more than I already do. I got cross at him because of the way he made it so much hard work for me to go and do something somehow ended up being my fault and now I'm meant to act like nothing happened.

TheNewSchmoo Sun 22-Jan-17 20:27:10

Name change?

Queenie87 Sun 22-Jan-17 20:30:25

Didn't feel comfortable using that name.

everycloudandallthatjazz Sun 22-Jan-17 20:39:55

It's difficult to give you advice as your post is quite vague (I can understand why, though). However, it sounds like he is twisting your words and that nothing you do is ever good enough. Is that right?

Queenie87 Sun 22-Jan-17 20:47:14

I don't know where to start. He can be so lovely. But the minute I'm pissed off or mad at him for something he turns in to this horrible person who goes on and on until I feel like I'm the one in the wrong. Today it was because I wanted to go and do some housework and he didn't want me to because he felt guilty that he couldn't help because he's ill. I said it needed doing anyway. He went on an on in a very antagonistic way until I snapped and I said I couldn't be doing with it and that it makes me feel like I'm going mad when I know I'm not in the wrong. And then I get a mouthful of how he just gives and gives and gets nothing back. But he won't explain what he means. I feel so sick and confused. I'm sorry I just feel broken.

ChuckSnowballs Sun 22-Jan-17 21:34:06

How long have you been together and what is the house situation?

Sugarpiehoneyeye Sun 22-Jan-17 21:37:32

You don't have to put up with this abusive man OP.
Is he always so controlling ?

everycloudandallthatjazz Sun 22-Jan-17 23:04:25

You feel sick, confused and broken. Your head is in a mess. It sounds like he is very controlling and manipulative. It's not you. Have you read up on emotional abuse / coercion? If so, do you recognise him in what you have read?

Sugarpiehoneyeye Mon 23-Jan-17 09:43:57

How are you today Sweet ?
Come back, we're here to support you. 💐

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: