I'm having serious anxiety around sex with my husband, like my skin crawls, I get worried and stressed and just don't want to do it at all.
I've realised it's got a lot to do with the fact that I've basically been doing it even though I really don't want to, especially since having a baby. I've been having sex with him because it makes living with him easier basically, he has a tendency to strop around, sigh, get angry, use excessive innuendo and just basically go on and on about how badly it affects him if he doesn't get it, he says he wants me to want it too but he doesn't seem to notice if I'm not particularly into it.
I feel like I have to because otherwise his behaviour will negatively affect me and it's easier to just do it so he leaves me alone. It's not exactly a supportive or balanced sexual relationship IMO.
I just told him about the anxiety, because I can't take the stress right now, and I really need him to be supportive and understanding about this if we have any hope of rebuilding our relationship. He said he's pleased I've told him, but he also said he needs to "figure out how he's going to deal with this" (I think meaning he needs some kind of sexual relief, and possibly trying to guilt me into it by implying he "needs" sex from somewhere).
He's now gone to the pub because he's "dizzy", code: sexually frustrated, but it's all a bit dramatic and self-centered for my liking. He also kept saying he had a pain in his balls, and that I could never understand the way this makes him feel because I'm a woman.
I just want a grown-up, supportive relationship. Exasperated.
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Relationships
Talk to me about sex anxiety and bad, bad communication
bananamuncher · 22/01/2017 16:38
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