Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Evening spoilt

(24 Posts)
Howlongtilldinner Sun 01-Jan-17 05:12:20

Out with DP and DP DD. DP/DD sitting next to each other me opposite. Beginning of the evening chatting/laughing/eating/drinking, all good. Entertainment comes on and (because it's behind me) I turn to the side to watch it. After about 10 mins his mood has changed, sulky. I ask what's wrong, he says nothing but face like a fiddle. Another 5 mins I ask again. Evidently I was turned around for too long and he was "sitting here on my own" . I explained I was watching the entertainment, but apparently I was turned BEFORE the entertainment (only turned to the side not with my back to him/DSD). I was, and still am, furious. It thoroughly spoilt a very enjoyable evening. Was I wrong?

midsummabreak Sun 01-Jan-17 05:21:15

Different expectations of what you were there for, maybe? If DH expected mainly chatting and look at entertainment around that, whereas you were enjoying the chatting but very happy to focus on entertainment once it started and leave chatting til later? Depends on how loud entertainment is as well, as difficult to chat when that starts if loud. I have trouble hearing once entertainment starts, so would do same as you and leave chatting until later. Was DD happy to watch entertainment?
Hard to understand him being so upset as you obv had no bad intentions, but maybe he thought the entertainment wasn't important to watch? Just one of those nights, but easy to sort out once discuss expectations of the night out? What was DD hoping to do, mainly chat or watch entertainment then chat afterwards?

Howlongtilldinner Sun 01-Jan-17 05:31:04

Mid..entertainment loud, but we had been chatting/pulling crackers etc beforehand. I had no expectations of the evening as I didn't think I needed to discuss what to do! Have never in my life discussed how an evening out should be structured, maybe I am in the wrong here?!

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea Sun 01-Jan-17 06:04:38

No, you're not in the wrong. He is being an arse.

Is this usual behaviour?

Howlongtilldinner Sun 01-Jan-17 06:10:13

Unexpected..yes can be. I'm putting it down to jealousy (no idea of what) and lack of attention, which I find pathetic.

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea Sun 01-Jan-17 06:37:09

It's deeply unattractive behaviour. Do you have to be with this guy?

Squeegle Sun 01-Jan-17 06:40:22

Sulking is so awful. If he does this often I think you have to talk about it. If he doesn't acknowledge it as a big issue then you need to consider what you want. My ex is a big sulker. It made my life hell. I never knew what I had done wrong. Many situations like the one you describe.

Thefutureisbright2017 Sun 01-Jan-17 07:32:24

Was the entertainment 'pleasing to the eye' so to speak? Perhaps he was jealous...wink

BakeOffBiscuits Sun 01-Jan-17 07:43:56

Oh god what a man child.
Sulking because you dared to look at the entertainment you were all listening tohmm

And he wasn't by himself, his dd was sat next to him.

I don't know who you can be bothered with the hassle of being with someone like this.

pklme Sun 01-Jan-17 07:49:24

Tell him he should have offered to swap seats.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Sun 01-Jan-17 07:50:57

What was the entertainment? Could the real issue be that he didn't actually find it entertaining at all?

Other than that I am lost. You can hardly watch a show with your back to it can you? confused

FatalKittehCharms Sun 01-Jan-17 07:51:14

So you were supposed to stare lovingly at his face while he and DSD watched the entertainment?

DH would have offered me the seat with the direct view of the entertainment.

MistressMaisie Sun 01-Jan-17 08:13:34

It could be something that happened earlier in the day. He is bearing a grudge and after a drink or two feels stroppy.
Does he get on with DSD? Did he not want to be left to socialize with her? Is she not often in your company?
Anyway he is being childish.

Lilaclily Sun 01-Jan-17 08:16:22

Is he always like this ?

ThePeoplesChamp Sun 01-Jan-17 08:20:36

a bit needy and controlling. MUST you have your eyes directly on him for a fixed perecentage of the day? FFS..

HermioneWoozle Sun 01-Jan-17 08:26:52

He sounds like a dick. How about not being rude to the people performing?

Howlongtilldinner Sun 01-Jan-17 10:48:06

It was HIS DD, and possibly bearing a grudge (its happened before) and yes I do think he's needy and I've told him that too. My previous relationship was with someone who spoiled every 'outing' due to his aggressive behaviour, and this just took me back. I'm questioning everything I do and I just can't live like that again.

Squeegle Sun 01-Jan-17 11:03:54

Nope, it's no way to live. My ex was just like this. And probably still is. I was an emotional wreck living with him and his moods.

ChapstickLegends Sun 01-Jan-17 11:06:36

But, but - HE could see the entertainment. Were you not meant to watch it or something? confused "Bad luck dear, you've got a dud seat"??

sonjadog Sun 01-Jan-17 11:09:43

That sounds unbearable. What you did was perfectly normal. We´re you supposed to sit staring at him all evening while the entertainment was going on behind your back?

This to me would be the end, or the beginning of the end if this was the first incident. Because next time you will be wondering where how you should sit, where you should look and you´ll be waiting to see how he reacts. That´s not a way to live your life.

Butterymuffin Sun 01-Jan-17 11:12:42

So he sulked because you turning to face the stage was like 'sitting on his own'? I'd walk away from this one. You will always be in trouble for not paying him enough attention.

ChuckSnowballs Sun 01-Jan-17 11:30:07

It is part of the training to stop you from not paying 100% attention to him.

Which you well know, as you have had it before.


Howlongtilldinner Sun 01-Jan-17 11:41:57

I posted this because I really wasn't sure if I'd done something wrong, it appears from all your responses that I hadn't. Thank you for making me feel like I'm not going mad.

And yes, I think LTB is the only way

Happy new yearconfused

pklme Sun 01-Jan-17 15:53:43

What a waste. Stupid man.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: