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Sedentary husband started going out for walks?

(64 Posts)
Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 18:28:58

Just this... things are not great between us, he's off work. He NEVER goes anywhere ever but is off for a walk and when pressed, probably stopping at a pub. He's gone for walks in last couple of days after arguments. It couldn't be another woman as he has no free time but it feels wrong though somehow, also unfair as I don't get to do this with our small dd to look after. Am I paranoid?

AnyFucker Fri 30-Dec-16 18:32:42

Tell him to take your dd out for "walks"

Why is he not working and why do you think he has no spare time to see OW ?

TrollTheRespawnJeremy Fri 30-Dec-16 18:36:48

Is he off work on holiday? I'd go out for a walk after an argument as well rather than let it escalate.

If he has no free time, is this not him trying to reclaim some? When you have small children often there is very little free time for anybody. Can you take an hour or two to do something that you like? (Although I very much dislike the tit for tat- you get 1hr to do this so I get 1hr for that.)

Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 18:37:10

It's too late for dd ☹️. He's taken week off work, he works hard in good job, no issue there. He has no time for an ow as he commutes and works long hours. He is also v lazy and only watches tv, plays online chess when off. He does play with dd at home and dotes on her. Other issue if going to pub is I just don't like that in a man and he already has gut I find off putting so: unfair, a turn off and also a bit suspicious although I can't work out why...

Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 18:38:29

Yes Troll but he went out day after argument to 'avoid conflict' even though there was none left as I had no energy.

Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 18:39:10

Now he's off having his nice long walk. I know I sound mean but I'm just fed up.

Euphemia Fri 30-Dec-16 18:40:17

Why are you having arguments?

228agreenend Fri 30-Dec-16 18:40:25

Does he take his phone with him? If so, could he be phoning ow during the walk (hope I'm wrong). Does he definitely Ely work long hours, or could he be visiting ow( hope I'm wrong again)?

Maybe he's just going out to clear his mind.

Whathappensnowthen Fri 30-Dec-16 18:42:50

Just to turn this around a bit, I started going for walks back in the summer. I have a sedentary office job and long commutes and I just wanted to regain some fitness. My husband is never keen on being left to look after all our young children by himself, so once I've put all the children to bed and they are all asleep, I go for a long walk. It's the only way I can fit any exercise in as I can't afford to go to a gym. I'm only gone for 25 minutes.

If you don't have any proof, then maybe he really has just gone for a walk.

Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 18:45:25

No he's definitely not doing it for fitness. He definitely works long hours. I'm sure he's cleaning his head perhaps on a pub stool
It's just that I never have that option and I'm fed up.

Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 18:45:49

Clearing his head.

Whathappensnowthen Fri 30-Dec-16 18:46:29

Why can you not go for a walk once your daughter is in bed?

PamDooveOrangeJoof Fri 30-Dec-16 18:47:04

If he has time to go on long walks then he has time to have an ow. Sorry op.
Maybe she works in/goes to the pub

Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 18:49:47

When she's in bed I am one to go to her if she wakes, I always prepare our evening meals, feel
Like I should watch tv with him besides our area is hardly scenic or safe at night.

PlumsGalore Fri 30-Dec-16 18:51:44

Met OW at work and goes for walks to call her?

TheCraicDealer Fri 30-Dec-16 18:58:23

Met OW at work and goes for walks to call her?

This is what I thought. I'd wait five minutes next time he goes out for a walk and then call him (ask if he can go to the shop en route or whatever) and see if there's an engaged tone, or if he does pick up to hear what his reaction is. If it seems like he's crapping himself then I'd be doing more digging.

It may very well be an attempt at regaining fitness, it being nearly NY and all, but still. If that was the case you'd think he'd have made more of a thing about it, wouldn't you? And it's more normal to take these notions in the good weather rather than in the middle of winter, surely.

Ilovecaindingle Fri 30-Dec-16 18:58:46

Woman from work works at local pub at night?

RozzlePops Fri 30-Dec-16 18:59:52

It doesn't sound like you like him very much.

Ramonaramona73 Fri 30-Dec-16 19:02:26

I don't at the moment rozzle as he's not been that kind to me lately....mostly for a long time.

FeckinCrutches Fri 30-Dec-16 19:06:51

I think he might be ringing someone.

Me and my Mum went for a late walk on Christmas Day about 6pm. We saw a guy in his car in the middle of nowhere on a phone and we both said 'affair'

peggyundercrackers Fri 30-Dec-16 19:19:25

Sounds like he's decided to head to the pub more often than not, is there a new barmaid?

Chops2016 Fri 30-Dec-16 19:19:43

How do you know it isn't for fitness? This time of the year it could be a new years resolution? And taking a walk to clear your head after an argument seems sensible enough.

he already has gut I find off putting

This is mean. If a guy posted this about his wife he would get slaughtered.

Trifleorbust Fri 30-Dec-16 19:26:11

You sound a bit like hard work tbh, OP. There is nothing wrong with him wanting to go to the pub occasionally, provided you get some time to yourself as well, but you sound like you don't want him to do that even if you do get more time yourself. And your comment about his gut isn't very nice.

tinglyfing Fri 30-Dec-16 19:29:07

So there's an argument...
Then he goes on one of his walks...
Who's starting the arguments?

TrollTheRespawnJeremy Fri 30-Dec-16 19:31:22

What has he done that he is not nice to you OP?

I have to agree, if post baby he was remarking on your weight I'd be unimpressed. It's the same vice versa as having a child can be stressful= weight gain.

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