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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Did something daft, feeling bad

54 replies

bananasmoothie · 20/02/2007 13:55

I posted about DP's mum buying his underwear...well as someone else said this attitude is likely to spill out onto other areas of his life and it does...

His mum packs his bag for him when he comes here, she washes all of his clothes, irons them all and then packs them for him when he goes away (or comes here) for the weekend.

Last weekend we bought a few lagers in and watched a film, towards the end of the night we were starting to get a little drunk, I ordered a takeaway for us both.

Anyway when I get drunk I get "silly" and DP was going on about how his mum had forgotten to pack him enough pairs of socks I got a bit irritated and flicked garlic sauce onto his black jeans for a laugh...it was only meant as a joke but due to teh drink I didn't really antisipate how annoyed this would make him. Anyway he was furious, tried to wipe it off with a damp cloth and made it worse, he eventually stormed upstairs and went to bed.

I didn't think much of it at the time but the next morning he was still angry, said he's taken the incident as a piss-take directed at his mother and he wanted the jeans washing before he went home. I agreed to wash them but the stain didn't come out.

He's calmed down a bit about it now but I'm still debating whether or not to pay for the jeans or just forget about it. I'm sure he's still annoyed about it, he's been a bit "off" with me ever since but he seems to be trying to "let it go", I feel quite bad about it but not sure I should bring it up again.

OP posts:

Report

hunkermunker · 20/02/2007 13:56

What will you get him for his 14th birthday?

bananasmoothie · 20/02/2007 13:57

If thats a hint at me being a troll I'm not.

OP posts:

mumblechum · 20/02/2007 13:57

Um, how is he a partner when you don't live together?

Sorry, just confused.

Tortington · 20/02/2007 13:58

you dont just have a relationship long term with the person. you have a relationship with the family.

if his mother seems to be a nightmare to you. you need to seriously think about it.

bananasmoothie · 20/02/2007 13:58

he works and lives away, we see each other every other weekend when he comes here to visit us and stays until the sunday.

OP posts:

madmarchhare · 20/02/2007 13:59

bloody hell, Id scarper if I were you.

Heavenis · 20/02/2007 13:59

Does dp live at home ?

wartywarthog · 20/02/2007 14:00

is he the guy that plays on his xbox all weekend and doesn't contribute to any of the costs?

lou33 · 20/02/2007 14:00

he's overreacting

it was a joke that went wrong and nothing more

Blu · 20/02/2007 14:01

Tell him to wash his own jeans in a stain remover that removes grease.
And stop running round him as if he was a kid - he's got his Mum to do tha already!

He sounds completeley childish and immature, so your sauce flicking antic was well-matched.

TeeCee · 20/02/2007 14:02

Sorry, let me get this right. You 'did something daft' and 'feel quite bad' and are considering buying him a brand new pair of jeans etc and this is because you flicked some black bean sauce at his jeans???
Oh - well, um, I think you both have some growing up to do. Either that or stay with him and he'll treat like his mother and you'll let him and you'll be miserable for the rest of your life.

bananasmoothie · 20/02/2007 14:02

Yes that's him although he does contribute money-wise.

I still feel he over-reacted a little, I would'nt have got so annoyed if he'd done it to me but I suppose everyone see's these things differently. Saying that though he has broken tons of my stuff, even if accidently he doesn't take care when using my things which in a way is just as disrespectful surely.

OP posts:

Heavenis · 20/02/2007 14:02

Get some vanish 'don't think stains think pink' see if that get the garlic out.

WanderingTrolley · 20/02/2007 14:03

I think you should write a letter of apology to his mum.

Sorry, can't take this one seriously. Hissy fit at flicked food, then taken as an insult to his mother (useless bint who can't pack him enough socks.)

I'm arfing.

madmarchhare · 20/02/2007 14:03

he has broken your stuff?

Heavenis · 20/02/2007 14:04

Ask him to play nicely with your things or his cloths get it.

monkeymonkeymoomoo · 20/02/2007 14:04

How old are you two??

He is immature and stupid, no you shouldn't buy him a new pair of jeans nor should you have washed them.

wartywarthog · 20/02/2007 14:05

iirc this guy doesn't treat you with any modicum of respect.

sort out the jeans with vanish, but the next time he breaks some of your stuff make him replace it.

bananasmoothie · 20/02/2007 14:05

he's broken a few things of mine, the TV remote he broke months ago, he broke my kitchen blinds, he broke a hair clip, he broke my sons brand new scalextric, he broke my bed, he broke the sofa, he broke a brand new electric screw-driver....just by being heavy handed with everything but as soon as I do anything to his stuff he goes nuts.

OP posts:

hunkermunker · 20/02/2007 14:05

I don't think you're a troll. I do think he's incredibly immature and I couldn't love someone whose mother washed their smalls still.

ScottishThistle · 20/02/2007 14:06

His Mum packs his bag!!!

How old is he???

wartywarthog · 20/02/2007 14:06

why are you still with him?

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hunkermunker · 20/02/2007 14:06

Oh, heavens, are you STILL with him?!

How is he with the boys now?

His temper seems to be escalating.

I thought you'd dumped him?

Please do.

madmarchhare · 20/02/2007 14:07

He broke your hair clip? FGS, it sounds as though you both need to grow up.

itsmeNDP · 20/02/2007 14:07

FGS.

You both need to get a grip

Flip

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