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Husband ruined Christmas. Again.

(108 Posts)
sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:16:34

He has form for going into a major sulk whenever he suspects I'm trying desperately to make the day go alright. emotionally abusive
Just had yet another year of him - not joining in, sulking, moaning, going into silent mode.
This was my Christmas day.
This year I AM going to leave him.

sooperdooper Sun 25-Dec-16 18:19:43

Deep breath, yes you will leave him this year and next year you won't have to put up with this shit smile

Best of luck for 2017, we're all here for you X

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:21:11

Thank you sooper. I'm feeling sorry for myself at the mo.

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:21:39

It was horrendous. X100.

sooperdooper Sun 25-Dec-16 18:22:45

Imagine how lovely next Christmas can be? smile

Do you have dc? Make a plan, you can do it, you can be happy & you deserve to be happy and next year can be your year

Lilacpink40 Sun 25-Dec-16 18:22:50

This is my first Christmas post-separation (Jan). I am so much happier than last year. I've been seeing someone for a month, but whether that lasts or not the real change is in me. I say what I like and I receive respect.

RubyWinterstorm Sun 25-Dec-16 18:22:54

Christmas can be a good eye opener

Stick with your resolution!

happychristmasbum Sun 25-Dec-16 18:22:55

Just feel empowered by the knowledge that you will never put yourself through this shite again. flowers

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:25:46

It's made me realise what a complete and utter fucking tosser he is.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Sun 25-Dec-16 18:26:00

Yes, you can and you will.

Rather than thinking of today as being shit, think of it as what you needed to finally jump into a much better, happier life.

Roll on next year 😉.

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:26:56

He didn't make an effort. Didn't care whether his children enjoyed the day or not. It was all about him.

heavenlypink Sun 25-Dec-16 18:29:14

You're not alone @sososofuckingfedup

My OH got up (moaned) Got breakfast and Bucks Fizz (moaned) Opened presents (moaned) Went to pub came home (moaned) Went to bed Got up (moaned) Went back to bed - where he still is now

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:30:57

heavenly, I'm sad for you but relieved at the same time, that's it's not just me.
Must be lots of us sad

ponyprincess Sun 25-Dec-16 18:32:17

You will do it! This is my first christmas after split and my time with my kids has been more relaxed and more fun than so many past ones where my ex did similar to yours...threw a strop, gave the silent treatment, did absolutely nothing positive or help at all with preparing yet moaned...who needs that? Free yourself in 2017!!!

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:32:50

I think we 'put up with it' for the sake of the peace.

That's how they get away with their terrible behavior.
they know that as mothers, we are hard wired to strive to make the day go smoothly for the happiness of our children.
Fecking b****tads

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:34:11

I really want to ditch his sorry ass.
But the financial side stops me. hmm

SangtheSun Sun 25-Dec-16 18:35:33

I had 20 years of similar OP. In fact i was just about to post that it had to be all about him, one way or another, when I saw you'd said much the same.
I'm guessing he's not an unselfish little ray of sunshine the rest of the year?
One of my kids told me last week " I hate Christmas!". When I asked why it was "because of dad".
So make it a present to yourself and them that you leave the self-centred git in 2017 and have a relaxed, happy Christmas next year.
I know the leaving is easier said than done but it's been 100% worth off or me. Best wishes.

sooperdooper Sun 25-Dec-16 18:35:53

Fuck their miserable ways, life doesn't have to be like that, use their shit-ness as inspiration for a new start

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:38:01

SangSun, my children notice.
They see the relaxed, lovely, Christmases that their friends are having.
It breaks my heart.

But then I start worrying that if I leave him, we will be worse off financially and then every day will be hard, not just Christmas.
What to do?

Graphista Sun 25-Dec-16 18:40:42

Sounds like my dad who I no longer have to tolerate. No amount of money worth tolerating this kinda shite, good luck for a new start in 2017. flowers

lubeybooby Sun 25-Dec-16 18:40:45


the hardest day financially having left, is still ten thousand percent better than the best days you currently have still remaining together.

I did it ten years ago, best decision ever, and finances right themselves in time. SO worth it. Do it x

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:44:01

He's great the rest of the year. Why does he act like a dick at Christmas (and any other family occasion?)

ItShouldHaveBeenJingleJess Sun 25-Dec-16 18:44:26

My first Christmas without emotionally abusive ex. Just me and DS. Other family were terribly worried I'd feel lonely - not at all, best Christmas ever. Stay strong, OP, we've got your back!

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:44:55

I think he hates my family. He wants to spoil any time I have with my family.

sososofuckingfedup Sun 25-Dec-16 18:45:50

IShouldHave, I would have loved this Christmas on my own.

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