Hi,
My girlfriend and I have an amazing connection and generally are happy. I do love her.
However, every now and then she focuses on something negative and will dwell on it until it becomes a 'thing'. Quite often there is something in what she is saying. There's been a few things: not having sex with her enough, not tidying up, not planning stuff for us to do, not doing the washing, not exercising, not wanting to cuddle? not being a go-getter etc. These things have become themes that she has a go at me about all of the time. I'll do my best address the issue then something else will come up. I have a very stressful job with a lot of responsibilities and I struggle to find energy at the end of the day for her at times but I'm doing my best. I give her much more attention and effort than anyone else I've been in a relationship with.
I don't know if I'm being unreasonable, she's insecure - so needs attention, she wants a good excuse to argue, she's attracted to negativity or I'm just a bad boyfriend?
I'm just sick of the constant worry and stress when we argue. The arguments sometimes get very nasty and almost become physical. I've had enough but I love her and would like us to be normal. It feels toxic and I can't see us moving to the next stage with these issues.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Will we ever stop arguing? Are we just not right for each other? How can I stop her from having a go at me constantly? Are we just bad communicators?
For context I'm 32 and she's 22. I'm a professional and she's studying. We live together.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
My girlfriend is constantly moaning at me
user1482177776 · 19/12/2016 20:29
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