For me or someone else?

[GimmieTea2]

Hi, I don't know if any of you have read my previous posts on here about my H I haven't posted for a while but here I go again.

Today at about half 2 I got a text from H (Who was at work since 11 and not due intill 8:30 tonight)
Written exactly; Hi, I have to go to another lesson so think I will finish at half 3 in stead today sorry!! Love you Xxx

Now he hasn't said I love you to me for well over a year and never puts X's on the end of a message and also doesn't have a job where he would have lessons....also not home.
What do you guys think??

[HappyJanuary]

I'd say he was texting an affair partner but the lesson thing is weird.

He could have lied about his job to her?

He actually is having lessons in something that you just don't know about?

It's an autocorrect for something else?

It reminds me of the texts I get from my children. Could one of your dc have texted him and he forwarded it to you?

[bluebeck]

Agree with Happy is it something he has forwarded from your DC?

If you have reason to doubt him, and from your post it seems he has form (?) then yes he has probably told someone he is a teacher or something.

What's the back story?

[LineyReborn]

Absolutely with Happy that that is a DC's message. My teenagers would send those.

Hope it's all ok.

[Snowflake65]

Does sound like a thing my DCs would text - do you have school aged children?

[GimmieTea2]

Happy He wouldn't be able to lie to someone about his work - he wear a uniform which has the company's name stamped over it. Also the DC's are home with me and I have showed them the message and they agree that it was meant for someone else.

He has lied about things before like going shopping with another women and walking the dog (Little and very old dog, apparently he went on a 6 hour walk on the beach... dog was clean as houses and wasn't even slightly out of breath) and treats me horrible all the time.

[goddessofsmallthings]

He treats me horrible all the time

Why are you tolerating his behaviour?

How old are your dc and what lessons do you think they're learning in what must be a toxic enivronment in which their father doesn't have a good word to say to ther dm?

[GimmieTea2]

goddess

Because I'm independant on him, I can't drive, I don't have a job. I have been trying to find a job for the last 6 months but nothing has come up and I have tried really hard I can't keep a house if I don't have a job, and where I don't drive I am fairly limited on where I can go. They are older teenagers and adults ( adults don't live at home )

[GimmieTea2]

Ok so he is now at home, he didn't mention the text at all, I did his dinner and waited for a while then asked him, he said he didn't send a text, I read the text to him and he said he had the same one, but deleted it. Swears he knows nothing about it...but it was sent from his phone.

[Believeitornot]

WHy did you show your dcs the text? Don't get them involved
Just ask him.

[DollyPlastic]

He's lying but don't drag your DCs into it.

[GimmieTea2]

I can't be of with not getting the DC's involved, they are around most of the time so are around when everything happens anyway so I can't pretend everything's fine when he is sitting there being moody creating a atmosphere or "Joking" around.

They are old enough to understand it like I said even the youngest is an older teenager.

[Believeitornot]

You don't get them to read dodgy texts and ask for their view

They won't thank you for it when they're older.

[DreamingofItaly]

I'm going to disagree with others and say I think it's great you have a relationship with your DC where you can talk to them about this. They're adults.

As for your DH. This doesn't sound great. You need to talk to him and figure this out. I'm afraid I don't have any helpful advice aside from that but be brave. You can get through this.

[unicornpoopoop]

This would drive me nuts! Are you just going to leave it how he's denied it or can you do some digging?

[Adora10]

Haha, he's full of BS, he sent it, to how OW on the side.

Apart from that, he treats you like shit, instead of making excuses like I am dependant on him, go and find your own way, get a job, support yourself, your kids are adults.

[OohhThatsMe]

He said he got the same one? Funny that he deleted it, isn't it?

Have you gone onto the Entitled To website, OP? And the child support?

It looks to me as though he's copied it by accident and pasted it in. I've done that sometimes and a chunk of text will appear in a message to someone else.

[SleepingTiger]

Whoa......it is quite possible to get a text from a third party accidentally displaying as from someone else's phone.

But for both of you to get the same text from a complete stranger to your separate phones is perhaps something David Attenborough would find a very rare animal indeed.

[SleepingTiger]

He is in love with someone else, or at least he thinks he is.

[OohhThatsMe]

SleepingTiger, you're saying it's possible say, for me to send you a message, but for it to show as your husband's phone?

Even if that were true (and I've never heard of it) then it wouldn't resolve the puzzle as the OP doesn't know anyone who'd send her that message.

[SleepingTiger]

Yes, at least it was a few years ago. I received a text from my DW - most definitely displayed as from her - asking me if I had thought about "Jackie stopping over xxx"

We didn't know a Jackie and DW was in hospital, broken limb, without her phone which was in my office at the time in a bag of other stuff for me to take to hospital after work.

[SleepingTiger]

But OPs husbands reaction "oh I got that too" is a deflection effectively acknowledging the message exists. But saying it is false.
We all know it's bollocks.

[skilledintheartofnothing]

Yes it was meant for someone else.
And he is so confident that you won't leave him he feel comfortable just brushing it off with the crappiest excuse ever.

[SleepingTiger]

So unfortunately for him, he has blown whatever scant cover he had.

[EverythingEverywhere1234]

He's lying and he's doing it badly to boot. If he'd just been confused rather than deflecting, I'd almost be more likely to believe him.
I can't believe you would drag your kids into this, even if they are older.

[WalterWhitesNipple]

Op start getting driving lessons now, search for jobs, buy a cheap car and then leave his sorry ass.