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Husband lying

(14 Posts)
ifeeltheneedtheneedforspeed Mon 28-Nov-16 09:22:43

Ok this may seem trivial compared to most posts on here but it's really getting to me.
We have a 2year old who I'm trying to get off the breakfast bottle (toddler does have a good breakfast). I've ask my husband over and over not to keep giving milk in bottle as she is quite capable of using the cup/beaker.
I've have had suspicions that all is too quiet downstairs so I gone to see what's happening. Husband is outside smoking (another issue) and our toddler is watching with a bottle of milk....the thing is....he is going to great lengths to hide this. He is getting her cup out and putting a splash of milk in it to make it look like she's drank out of it. He then rinses the bottle. I watched him do this all the last 2 days but think it's being going on for ages. I asked this morning 'how much milk did she drink' and replied 'about half a cup'
Our relationship hasn't been good for a while (I have other posts) and I feel this is just another case of him not respecting my wishes for the good of our child, coupled with the fact he's covering his tracks and lying.
Not really sure why I'm posting....maybe to get others opinions? I've spoken to a friend and my mum and they both have the same reply 'men!!' hmmconfused

Cricrichan Mon 28-Nov-16 09:31:31

He's being lazy. He finds it easier to give her a bottle as she prefers it. Show him pictures of children with rotting teeth or tell him about all the ones that need their teeth pulled out etc.

Guiltypleasures001 Mon 28-Nov-16 09:32:25

Or throw the bottle op harsh but maybe needed

ifeeltheneedtheneedforspeed Mon 28-Nov-16 09:35:58

I agree he is being lazy but it's the lengths he's going to to hide it is bothering me.
I would throw the bottle but at the moment she's still having a bedtime bottle (which I'm happy for her to have for a few more months) but I really want her out of the habit of the morning one.
He does it under the disguise of giving me a lay-in when in fact it's so he can go have a fag in front of our child which he agreed not to do.

bluebell9 Mon 28-Nov-16 09:52:18

Have you spoken to him about knowing he gives your DD a bottle in the morning?

Its not addressing the problem of your DH lying to you but could you hide the bottle at night so he can't give it to your DD?

BumDNC Mon 28-Nov-16 10:29:35

I would throw the bottle - she's old enough to have a bed time drink in a cup as well. Get rid of it all round. She will be fine - mine were fine

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Mon 28-Nov-16 10:32:20

Devious, going through that charade.

LineyReborn Mon 28-Nov-16 10:35:54

Does he then expect you to reuse the bottle that has only been rinsed not properly washed? I'm no clean freak, but that's not great for a toddler. So that would annoy me.

WatchingFromTheWings Mon 28-Nov-16 10:41:34

I agree with what others have said...throw the bottles out.

ifeeltheneedtheneedforspeed Mon 28-Nov-16 11:20:15

I haven't said anything these past few days as I wanted to see exactly what he was doing but when I have tried to talk to him before about not giving the bottle his reply is always 'she won't drink it from the cup' so my reply is along the lines of, she's CAN drink but she's being awkward if she doesn't want it then she will go without (she has very milky weetabix at breakfast so not like she's not getting milk)
He is using the bottle from night before so he is not washing it properly (I leave the night bottle in the sink and wash it in the morning)
Yes I could remove the bottles totally but my issue is more the fact that would rather lie to my face and plant a fake set up hmm

BumDNC Mon 28-Nov-16 11:26:21

But I suppose to him, this is a silly issue - she gets the bottle at bed so what's the real difference? It won't help if she wants a bottle over a cup anyway which then leads to her refusing cup etc, then he is trying to find a way around it to give milk she's getting mixed messages. No more bottles no more lazy parenting. Also I suppose he doesn't see why you get to make all the parenting choices? He's in charge of breakfast so he's doing it his way.

She shouldn't be having a bottle teat at all for her teeth and speech development age 2.

One thing tho - is he leaving her unattended while she is eating? That is dangerous.

ifeeltheneedtheneedforspeed Mon 28-Nov-16 11:29:39

No he's not in charge of breakfast, she has breakfast with me a little later when he's gone to work. Not sure how you come to conclusion that I get to make all the parenting decisions from this one issuehmm he had agreed to give it to her in the cup,

Trifleorbust Mon 28-Nov-16 11:31:50

That would really bother me to be honest, because I would be wondering what else he was prepared to lie about. It's also disrespectful to your efforts to introduce a cup.

BumDNC Mon 28-Nov-16 11:33:40

Probably why he is telling fibs is that he wants to do things his own way sometimes and knows you won't approve.its annoying but solved by:

Getting up with her instead
Throwing bottles out
Talking to him

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