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How do you deal with rejection?

(9 Posts)
auntiepammy Tue 22-Nov-16 19:05:22

I asked a man out who I'd fancied for quite a while, he said no, not at the moment.
He was kind, I don't know what his reasons were for saying no, i don't suppose it matters really.
I can't help but feel a bit crap, I'm not ugly, but I feel that he sees me as being ugly as he turned me down.
My question is, if you've been rejected, how do you deal with it?
I'm finding it hard to move on as I really fancy him

goddessofsmallthings Tue 22-Nov-16 19:36:46

His reasons for declining your offer are immaterial, but I very much doubt they have anything to do with your looks so don't allow that negative thought to dent your self-confidence.

Chalk this experience up to it being his loss and open your eyes - there's no shortage of fanciable guys 'out there', any number of whom would be delighted to accept an invitation to go out with you.

auntiepammy Tue 22-Nov-16 19:40:50

Thanks for your reply goddess, I can't help but feel crap about him turning me down, I know there's other guys out there that would be happy to go out with me, I just fancied him like mad, it was pretty crap when he said no

Summerlovinf Tue 22-Nov-16 19:50:31

i can understand you're disappointed but really there are so many reasons why he might not want to go out with you. Maybe he's seeing someone, has an elderly relative he needs to care for, he's not long out of a relationship, he's gay, he doesn't date co-workers, he's training for a sporting event and doesn't have time...or heaven forbid, he doesn't fancy you. Try not to see it as 'rejection' ...he has a choice and decided to say no. You'll find someone who does want to go or with you soon.

forumdonkey Tue 22-Nov-16 19:53:33

OP do you date every person who asks you? I bet you don't, but that doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with them.

goddessofsmallthings Tue 22-Nov-16 19:54:06

Win some, lose some, honey, but don't become so fixated on this one that he becomes the one that got away. smile

Bonxie Tue 22-Nov-16 20:02:53

Oh I know it feels rubbish, but it almost certainly has nothing to do with you (and nothing to do with your looks).

These things are utterly random, and the right person will say yes.

HuskyLover1 Tue 22-Nov-16 20:11:34

Do NOT take it personally! We have all been there.

Light years ago, I got rejected by a guy, who seriously was bloody lucky to have had any chance with me. I was a hot babe at the time and he was below par and had BO. I was a bit vulnerable tho, and exiting an awful marriage, and quite frankly just wanted any male attention. shame that he rejected me the day after he shagged me

It's not you, it's him, and quite frankly it's his loss. he probably can't get it up

auntiepammy Wed 23-Nov-16 17:37:20

Thanks everyone, you've helped a lot. Husky, like you I've not long come out of a bad marriage, it probably wasn't a good idea to ask anyone out, thus risking rejection as my self esteem is a bit low, but at least I know now.

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