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How to detach?

(4 Posts)
ToddWheresMyGoddamnLatte Mon 21-Nov-16 08:36:35

It's still early days as we only split on Friday but how do I detach my feelings from ExH?

Every time I see him or think about him I just can't quite believe the man I married has treated me so poorly.

Then I start feeling something that I can't even put my finger on. It isn't anger, sadness, hate but it's also all of those.

Has anyone else had this? I feel like I'm on the brink of madness with it.
If I distract myself it's not too bad so I'm trying to do that as much as I can but when it comes across me I really do feel like a madness has descended.

Has anyone got any helpful advice? I would really appreciate it as I feel like I've nowhere else to turn.

TheNaze73 Mon 21-Nov-16 08:39:47

This will seem boring & predictable but, you're going to just have to take it day by day in small steps. Every one of these small steps, will be a step in the right direction.
It'll be evolution, not revolution as it was only Friday. In context, if he'd gone away for a stag, he'd not have been back yet. This is the long haul but, it'll get bettter

ToddWheresMyGoddamnLatte Mon 21-Nov-16 08:50:44

I know what you're saying is true TheNaze3
I'm usually a pragmatic and accepting person and I understand the process I'm going through.

I think I just wanted someone to post with an answer that would magically take all the crap away but I've just got to learn to live with it.

Esoteric Mon 21-Nov-16 11:09:45

Feel for you, at the moment I haven't left but am planning to do so . I have all those emotions going through my mind and what I am most sorry about is the person I married although there in person, isn't actually the same person. Married a kind, slightly hippyish very genuine person who was happy with a week (going on the coach) to Italian lakes and somewhere OK to live (although he has always had a thing for good areas) 20 years down the line, any hotel is a shit hole unless it's 5 star top of the range and housing standards similar. Problem is now champagne standards, beer money income (a bit better than that but def not up to the level he would need) . I think the problem is as others say it's baby steps needed, but no one wants to feel shit for months. I plan on taking up some new things that wouldn't have gone down well before, losing some weight , and doing stuff just for me that I had never got around to.

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