The year before last he was unwell, with cancer. It was localised, and treated successfully but it defined the year. He is also disabled, with an unrelated condition and is a mobility scooter user.
Every year he has said how lovely it would be to go the the Carols at Kings, in Cambridge. Usually you have to sit around all day to get a ticket but they do keep a few back for those with disabilities etc. So I wrote in, told them about my dad and very luckily got 2 tickets! He and my mum planned to go down to Cambridge, have some late lunch there and make a day of it.
Christmas came and I asked how it was and my mum gushed at how moving and amazing it was, how great the seats were etc. I asked my dad and he said "I didn't want to go in so I listened to it on the radio in the car."
And so it transpires that he decided he didn't fancy it afterall, but drove my mum and brother to Cambridge, dropped them at Kings, and went for a pint. 
My brother is in his 40s, perfectly not disabled, as is my mum.
What the hell was that about? When I said I was hurt, that was my surprise to him and my mum and brother shouldn't have taken those tickets, he said he'd changed his mind and it was up to him who he gave them to, and I was being silly.
It's shitty though isn't it?
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Why would my Dad do this?
Jimminyriddle · 17/11/2016 14:36
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Possibly. One of the reasons we are NC is his longstanding drink problem. It was just that this was such a special thing, and so hard to get tickets etc. Sad to sabotage it.
I sent quotes big present for his birthday (big birthday) from all of us, grandchildren etc, even though we were almost totally NC, and instead of thanking us, he rang the courier company to get them to pass on a message to "the sender" that he didn't know who had sent it, yet I had included a gift card, and anyway it was obvious it was from us. It's odd how this is all coming back to me.
They lived overseas for a while, and I went to visit. We went out for dinner on the last night I was there, and I'd said I'd get dinner but when the bill came they didn't accept my kind of credit card, so my mum paid. It wasn't tons either, incidentally, about £40. On the way to the airport he drove me to a cash machine and told me to get the money out to cover dinner. I was a bit shocked but did it, and mentioned it to my mum (she wasn't there at the time) and she went batshit with him. He didn't pass the money on to her either, he just kept it. I think he thinks I owe him somehow.
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He sounds a lot like my dad....manipulative behaviour, character assassinations, the odd out pouring of affection, and sadly the drinking problem.
Things blew up between us 3 years ago and I gave him a very clear warning that I was nearing the end of my ability to put up with his shit. He carried on and nothing changed, so six months later I called time on it, changed my number and refuse all contact with him. It's really sad but I feel 10 tonnes lighter without his bs....I spent 30 years trying to please him.
I hope you find some resolve OP, your dad sounds like a total shit and I'm sorry about that. My advice is try to please yourself from now on, 
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