I need a woman's point of view
My wife and I have been together for 9 years married for 5 with 3 little girls.
Ever since we got together I have not been the greatest partner. The main problem was my temper I was always on a short fuse and took it out on her. I lied about money problems (my thought at the time I was protecting her). She became pregnant after our first child and she felt pressured in to getting a termination. I have been violent on times and have hurt her.
I took sometime out and realised how I was treating her and the thought of me losing her almost killed me. I knew myself I had to change I spoke to her and told her how I felt and how I wanted to change. At the same time she found herself getting fed up of being a doormat and started to think about herself and having time for her self. She doesn't know if she can get over what has happened in the past and if we have a future. It all came to a head last weekend when she told me that she could do no more and thought it was best to end the relationship. We managed to talk and she took some time and thought and decided to give it one more chance.
She has said that she feels distant but I don't want to put presure on her and I feel that she doesn't even want to kiss me. I do try and being romantic and making her feel special but I don't know if it's enough for her to know how much I love her and want this to work.
I completely understand that this will take time but is there any advice on how I can help her get over what has happened. I know that I am lucky and that she should have left a long time ago. She has said that maybe I changed too late in the relationship. And she isn't too interested in speaking to a professional.
Is there any advice please I'm desperate for my wife to be able to know she sees a future with us together. I know I can't change the past but I want to be in her future.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Husband in need of advice
ScaredHusband · 15/11/2016 22:04
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