Dad ignoring his children.

[mintytoothpaste]

Long story short, I left my abusive H two years ago with my children and fled to a refuge. During the past 2 years Ive kept contact for the sake of the children. Finally the marital home was sold 2 weeks ago in negative equity. XH has made comments in the last few months about not keeping contact as he wont have a home the children can stay at. My eldest is 6 and the last time he spoke to his dad was last Saturday, he's phoned him every night since and XH no longer picks up the phone. Am I wasting my time trying to help the children keep contact?

[LittleRed321]

It sounds like he is being emotionally abusive/manipulative by saying he won't have a home now. Is there a court order/supervised contact in place? He can still maintain contact with his children via mutually agreed family members or contact centres depending on any risk he may pose/if his accommodation is inappropriate. Children have a right to contact with both of their parents, but if he's not being manipulative and just choosing not to continue seeing his children then there's not much you can do I'm afraid, other than keep the door open for your children in the future.

[mintytoothpaste]

No, theres no contact order in place and he's simply stopped answering the phone. My son hasn't questioned yet why Dad isn't answering, what on earth do I say when he asks me and should I try to discourage him from ringing every night?

[jeaux90]

My 7 year old has no contact with hers. He was an abusive narc. Don't push it if it's not going to happen or indeed seeing as he is abusive why would you if he isn't interested.

I told my daughter when she asked recently that sometimes people are not very capable of being good people or doing the right thing.

It's a hard one, I'm sure you'll find the words.

Xxx