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Friend drought

(10 Posts)
Lucy7400 Sat 12-Nov-16 12:48:01

Its just dawned on me that some of my friendships are coming to an end. I have jusy returned to work after almost a decade and I no longer see the mums from the school gate who I regarded as friends. I guess it was the school gate who bought us together and thats it. confused , another friend who I knew from NCT days is moving far away and I dont think we will stay in touch. Sounds odd, but we used to meet once or month or so but the friendship didnt extend to husbands or families so chances are it wont continue. Then another longterm friend is moving on. I wont go into that but suffice to say shes married someone very wealthy and is just not interested in her old friends. It just feels a bit odd that this is happening at the same time. I guess I need to start finding some new friends.

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 17:29:14

I'm similar - have lost touch with all mums now we don't go to the school gates and I just changed jobs!

I need to put more effort in myself really

These things do seem to go in cycles. I think you will find new friends in time, get yourself out and about

Lucy7400 Sat 12-Nov-16 18:25:22

Thankyou myusernamemyusername. I am feeling a bit mopey at my poor judgement. Sort of daft to think you will be friends with people who are just acquaintancies. As they say, friends are for a reason or a season. Its just unfortunate the end of the season applies to so many!

singleandfabulous Sat 12-Nov-16 21:36:00

I think it takes a herculean effort to keep so many diverse friendships running these days. We move around and change jobs so frequently now that its impossible to accommodate everyone. Add to that the time pressures we all face and its a wonder anyone has any friends. I think the thing that hurts the most though is realising that youre so insignificant to so many people. Its shut isnt it.

singleandfabulous Sat 12-Nov-16 21:37:00

ffs ... that should be 'it's shit isnt it.'

Lucy7400 Sat 12-Nov-16 22:00:42

I think thats the thing. I have spent the last 7 years helping each other out with childcare, going for coffees, organising hideous PTA events etc. And now nothing. That combined with my long term friend dumping me for her shiney new friends I am just sulking. Anyway, on a bright note. I think returning to work will be a turning point for me. I have been so focussed on the dcs for the last 10 years, I can now afford some new hobbies which hopefully will be new friends.

LittleRed321 Sat 12-Nov-16 22:04:42

I'm feeling the same in terms of a friend drought. I've recently moved to a new area with my partner and don't really have any friend connections there, plus I'm in a temp job where the people treat you like rubbish. Any suggestions on how to meet new people outside of a working environment?!

heavenlypink Sat 12-Nov-16 22:15:38

I have very few 'true' friends. I think in my case having only one child (now a late teen) with SN/LD it means my life has taken a very different route. While they are all experiencing the empty nest syndrome and the 'excitement' of their children going to university and plans for the future I have the prospect of my child never leaving home/living independently. My idea of an achievement for my DS right now is him managing his anxiety and getting the bus home alone - not passing a driving test or achieving a distinction in an exam. Very lonely sad

Lucy7400 Sun 13-Nov-16 11:12:44

No suggestions Littlered. I am hoping to join a sports club and see from there.

[Flowers] heavenlypink so sorry to hear that. It must be so hard for you.

heavenlypink Sun 13-Nov-16 14:27:12

Thank you Lucy7400 I think the idea of a new hobby would work really well for you. It's something I would be interested in having a go at myself - for the "me-time" if nothing else. Just a problem fitting it in

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