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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

My husband has hit our daughter and she keeps getting constant UTIs.

(104 Posts)
user1478635055 Tue 08-Nov-16 20:06:53

Would this make you question things?

123bananas Tue 08-Nov-16 20:08:42

How old is your dd? What do you mean by hit?

Fairybella Tue 08-Nov-16 20:10:22

Question what things??

AyeAmarok Tue 08-Nov-16 20:10:35

Do you think the two are related?

Or do you just not think that a man battering a child is enough of a reason to leave?

Scoose Tue 08-Nov-16 20:10:40

I think a lot more information is needed

Laptopontable Tue 08-Nov-16 20:11:19

I'd definitely have some questions if my husband hit my daughterhmm

ivehadenough10 Tue 08-Nov-16 20:11:46

Errr yes definitely question things shock

user1478635055 Tue 08-Nov-16 20:12:13

Sorry I will be back to explain.

She is 9 it was a hit as in book thrown at her.

MargoChanning Tue 08-Nov-16 20:12:31

I assume your questioning if the UTI is a sign of sexual abuse? It could be. Or it might not be. If you have concerns - and it sounds like you do - then please take your daughter to your GP ASAP.

PurplePen Tue 08-Nov-16 20:13:01

Unless I was all packed and walking out of the door with my DD, then Yes I'd be questioning why I was such a shit parent.

Hth.

BumWad Tue 08-Nov-16 20:13:06

Why are you posting this online?

Pickled0nions Tue 08-Nov-16 20:13:15

I would question why he is hitting her. Is it because she's done something wrong or is he just being abusive for the sake of it?
The UTI I'm not sure what you're implying. Are you assuming something sinister is going on?

Propertyquandry Tue 08-Nov-16 20:14:46

I've read and re-read this 4 times now and all the usual MN phrases are going through my head but mainly,
Are you on drugs????

What the hell are you asking? Should you question the fact he has hit her? Hell yes! Or are you implying that as well as being physically abusive he is also sexually abusive? Because if you have the slightest worry that your daughter is being subjected to sexual abuse then you must do something now. Tonight. You must ensure she is safe.

If however, you have no reason to even question such a thing and your only reason to suspect SA is regular UTIs then perhaps start by taking her to the GP.

But he hits her and you're questioning things so I'd say trust your instinct. She's a child. Your child. Show her you will protect her.

Laptopontable Tue 08-Nov-16 20:16:19

Yea and don't worry about coming back to fill a bunch of strangers in.. just get your daughter somewhere safe where she won't be subjected to violence.

Notagain16 Tue 08-Nov-16 20:16:45

I dread to think.

MatildaTheCat Tue 08-Nov-16 20:16:53

Your daughter should be investigated if she has constant UTIs. I would be amazed if it wasn't routine to check for signs of sexual abuse in this situation. Ask your GP if she isn't being followed up.

Was the book throwing an isolated incident or just part of an aggressive back story? This sort of matters IMO. You are concerned enough to post here so speak to dh about the aggression.

How is dd around her dad?

CrazyDuchess Tue 08-Nov-16 20:18:34

The second the book left his hand and struck your daughter - he should be your STBXH!

Get your daughter to safety and book a GP appt asap

Whatabloodyidiot1 Tue 08-Nov-16 20:19:06

If you even vaguely suspect that the two are linked you get out of the house with your daughter now.
Even if you don't think the two are linked, he hit your child so you get out of the house with your daughter now.....

Lunar1 Tue 08-Nov-16 20:20:10

Do you suspect he is abusing her?

Smartleatherbag Tue 08-Nov-16 20:22:12

Get her away from him, based on the book throwing alone.

user1478635055 Tue 08-Nov-16 20:22:13

She is safe I don't want you to assume she isn't. The reason I'm asking is because if he through the book at her would you question the UTIs, that was my question.

AnyFucker Tue 08-Nov-16 20:22:18

I think you should seek some RL advice

After you have removed your daughter from the vicinity of your husband

Smartleatherbag Tue 08-Nov-16 20:23:02

Ask the gp to assess her. I hope she is ok, and you.

AnyFucker Tue 08-Nov-16 20:24:09

I don't really understand the link you are making between throwing the book at her and whether the UTI'S are a sign of sexual abuse

AnyFucker Tue 08-Nov-16 20:25:11

Sexual abuse can exist without physical abuse and vice versa

You have plain evidence of at least one

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