Please help me!
I am about to be very honest about an issue I have never said out loud to another human being. I have to say it here because I need honest advice and this is eating me alive!
So I am married and DH is sweet. He helps out a lot at home with chores and the baby as well and I am so thankful.
BUT...he is not ambitious at all! We are currently living in a house owned by his parents and every single time I bring up buying our own property together later in life we have a big fight. He says he is content with where he is. We have a tiny three door car and I find it difficult getting in the back with the baby. I have mentioned the car is unsuitable for parents with a baby; it was hell squeezing in there while coming home from the hospital with the baby but he says he will have to pay more in insurance and petrol so not keen on a bigger car. I have worked all my life and doing just 16 hours now because of baby and will be going back full time next year. He has hinted that I will be doing some heavy lifting financially when I start working full time...I said no problem because we both know I will be making more money than him. Then he has told me that if my income gets up to 50k he will stop working altogether as he sees no need to keep on working where his wife is earning 50k per year.
This attitude of his worries me so much because of my father...he had a highly underpaid job, relied heavily on my mum and never looked after me and my siblings. My mum brought all five of her children up to the best of her ability and we kids struggled to go through school and do the rest.
I love my husband but when he cannot be asked to get a better job or talk about quitting work to live on my salary or make investments that will make our lives better, I feel like my worst fear has come upon me ie I have married a man like my father.
I feel miserable and it is beginning to affect my well being and my relationship with him ie our sex life.
I need advice please, thanks people xx
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
questioning my marriage
Bigmomma28 · 08/11/2016 16:52
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