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I do now think this is emotional abuse, what next?

(7 Posts)
Womadia28 Sun 06-Nov-16 10:44:55

I posted a few days earlier about feeling trapped, unappreciated and unsupported. After reading a few articles (thanks keeponrunning) I think I may be experiencing emotional abuse in some form.

Stuff happened last night and this morning but I can't post exact details without outing myself but I just now feel more helpless and trapped. I have done nothing but cry this morning as I feel I can't talk to anyone about this (DM is manipulative/narcissistic/ non empathic). The few friends I have I hide behind a mask, I really can't talk to them. I know I have to leave this as I don't think date nights, help with childcare are going to work but I've lost all my confidence and backbone. If I think of steps to make the split from DH (who I love in a warped way) all I see are lots of negative outcomes.

fc301 Sun 06-Nov-16 11:13:25

Oh dear. So sorry for you.
Maybe try to break this down into small achievable steps.
Educate yourself by reading up about narcissists, emotional abuse, anything relevant.
Look for counselling locally.
Definitely discuss in confidence with your GP.
There are many empowered women on here who have taken control of their own lives. They will be able to give you practical advice (better than me).
Well done you for taking the first small steps to reclaiming your sense of self xx

Womadia28 Sun 06-Nov-16 13:10:26

Thank Fc. I'm now just trying to zone myself out as if I do or say anything it provokes a reaction that is unsatisfactory. I'm tired, sad and battle worn.

These will be very small steps as my self esteem and confidence feels like they have been shot to bits.

fc301 Sun 06-Nov-16 13:27:34

Yes. what you need to do is put boundaries in place, not rise to the bait (with either of them), not take it personally (its them not you) and not argue back.
Easier said than done when you are bruised, wounded, shocked and angry.
I find chanting fuck em internally helps!

PickAChew Sun 06-Nov-16 13:34:12

Zoning out is a good move. Detach from the unreasonable, be civil when he is reasonable and, so long as you are safe, quietly get your head around everything, find out what your options and rights are, squirrel away anything important or personally valuable and then be very to move very quickly, because it's unlikely that he'll let you go with Drama.

Are you the poster with the baby and toddler?

PickAChew Sun 06-Nov-16 13:34:49

And that would be without drama.

Womadia28 Sun 06-Nov-16 15:08:32

No that's not me pickachew. The DC have picked up on the tension as they are behaving awfully today.

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