My daughter is getting married next year and my Mum wanted to help her a bit financially. I thought that she would give a few hundred pounds but it was actually a few thousand - very generous. I had my reservations but couldn' t think of any valid reason why my daughter shouldn't accept the money so she did and booked her wedding. My Mum has now started making demands: she wants my brother's daughter to be bridesmaid (ignoring the fact that my sister has 2 girls); vet the guest list and venue; wants remote relatives on her side invited and doesn't think that my step son and daughter should be invited (even though the 3 of them were brought up together and they are still close). She has said all this too me and not my daughter and I have not said anything either. I have guided my daughter in the direction of my niece as a bridesmaid, said that I will take my Mum to the venue, but reminded her that it is all booked so can't be changed, and put my foot down as far as my stepchildren are concerned - they are coming. This leaves the relatives ; there may or may not be space we don't know yet, but my Mum insists and last week she finally said what I know she has been thinking - that they should come because she is paying. I am upset, my husband is furious and insists that we pay her back the money, even though we can't afford it - we have already made our contribution. I am not saying anything to my daughter as I don't want her day spoiled - and I told my Mum that. What should I do: tell my daughter to invite these relatives? Leave my daughter alone to invite who she wants and I any soak up my Mum's displeasure? Either way should I pay my Mum back so we are not beholden to her? I could certainly benefit from some collective wisdom. Thank you in advance.
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Relationships
My Mum is making demands over my daughters wedding.
unababy · 05/11/2016 15:41
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