My husband walked out on me on Tuesday and I'm in pieces. Things hadn't been great, due to work, mother with dementia and other stuff I've been depressed and not myself for a long time. I haven't been nice to him and I know it's all my fault but I buried my head in the sand and just tried to get through every day, I took him for granted, constantly rejected him as depression meant I had no sex drive and never thought he would leave me. Now he has and I feel like life is not worth living anymore. I have 2 beautiful girls but I can't even stop crying in front of them. Eldest (his step daughter) is taking it really hard, she already has mental health issues and her biological dad is a joke so to all intents and purposes he is her dad. Our youngest idolises him and just keeps crying for him. I just want him back, I recognise my problems now and went to the Drs today. She gave me a referral to health in mind and a prescription fraud r anti depressants but I'm scared to take them incase it makes things worse or he thinks I'm weak (not very understanding of depression etc). I keep texting him, begging him to reconsider and making my intentions clear on wanting to be the girl I used to be that he fell in love with. I made the worst decision tonight and have sat alone drinking, I'm now crying my eyes out, proper big snotty sobs and also have alcohol induced libido so want him desperately (oh the irony). No support network as my only real best friend lives miles away so I see her once or twice a year if I'm lucky. All my other friend are more work acquaintances than proper friends I feel I can confide in. As I mentioned earlier my mum has dementia and can't even hold a conversation and my dad died 7 years ago. I feel so alone, i can't face work (I'm a teacher so it's not really a 'go in and have a little cry at your desk if you need it' profession.) I can't face talking to anyone I know and telling them what's happened, I just want to run away and never come back.
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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
ITCouldBeWorse ·
05/11/2016 09:41
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