Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

He's left hand holding needeed

(465 Posts)
Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 08:46:38

Ok so I posted before the thread about making a tit out of myself. Things have continued I get stressed and have a go every time she texts and start the whole argument over again he got naffed off last night and left. He's not come back yet. I am probably being paranoid I just can't help going into a rage every time she texts help. I have recently gone on the mini pill can that screw your head up I have never been a jealous person

BubbleGumBubble Fri 04-Nov-16 08:54:50

Who text him?
Why does it bother you?

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 08:57:44

Sorry there is a woman at our horses stable call her v she texts him I got in a stew last week about him being secretive about the texts and I can't seem to get over it

BubbleGumBubble Fri 04-Nov-16 08:59:45

Sorry OP you need to give more background.
Why does she text him.
What does he do that is secretive.
Do you think he is having an affair.

Iamdobby63 Fri 04-Nov-16 08:59:54

How often is she texting? I read your other thread about your concerns and him making more of an effort with his appearance.

TheNaze73 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:01:55

Can you elaborate op?

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:02:05

I am nit picking on every little inaccuracy. Like I sent v a text about the horse he said he saw it she was offended and thinks I hate her. To me that implies he was with her but she sent him a copy of it and there was no mention of her being offended or thinking I hate her so why stir it

BubbleGumBubble Fri 04-Nov-16 09:05:18

I have no idea what the hell you are on about confused

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:07:59

She texts him as we have an arrangement with her about horses but they have become friendly he didn't tell me he went round her house to do some jobs he didn't tell me he was giving up drinking he text her for support. I doubt they are having an affair but I can't stop going into a rage when she texts it was like 20 texts last night just to say can we put the horses out this morning why so many simple yes or no so I lost it he showed me the messages and he had put got to go she is being difficult

BastardGoDarkly Fri 04-Nov-16 09:08:19

Can you link to your other thread op? There's a lot more to it. No need to be bloody ride Bubble

I actually think you've got a point OP, as did many others on your thread, you seem determined to argue with yourself that it's you not him though?

Iamdobby63 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:08:51

What did your text to her say?

IreallyKNOWiamright Fri 04-Nov-16 09:10:28

Hi op. I remember this. You need to show him the door. It sounded last time like something was going on. We can only give you advice But in the end you have to contact her and tell her to back off. Does she even know he is married.

BubbleGumBubble Fri 04-Nov-16 09:13:03

How was I rude!!

The OP is not making any sense. Its like she expects posters to know whats going on like we know her confused

OP probably best that he has gone for a bit as you need to get your head together.

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:13:21

Yes she knows he's married she's friends with dd. My text was very polite and only about horse arrangement that we aren't doing all weekend for her. She never replied to me which pissed me off

Iamdobby63 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:13:32

Personally I think you have every right to feel the way you do, the friendship (which you are being excluded from), the changes to his behaviour (not drinking), the changes to his appearance (especially the attention to his pubes). Honestly, I think I would be as concerned as you.

What was your marriage like prior to the horse? Were you happy?

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:14:54

How do I link my other thread

BastardGoDarkly Fri 04-Nov-16 09:15:57

It's a you and them situation now, certainly not you, dh and then her. He's the problem. 'She's being difficult' cheeky cunt.

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:19:30

He only allowed me to see his phone last night no evidence of an affair but lots of chat not relating to the horse like she sent a picture of herself at a party then complained about being hungover his reply oooh u naughty girl ???

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:22:22

I have phones in sick from work I thought he would have been home by now to change before going to the yard I have no idea where he was last night

AnyFucker Fri 04-Nov-16 09:25:57

This is no way to live is it ?

You don't actually sound coherent you ate so wound up about this

No man is worth getting yourself in such a state for

Tell him to stay away and get your head together. I can't remember if you have kids but you need to sort yourself out for their sake if you do.

Iamdobby63 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:29:16

It doesn't actually matter if they have 'done anything', their level of communication is inappropriate as you are not comfortable with it and it's fine for you to have an issue with this. His loyalties should be with you and he should lead the level of communication - he is the one who is married.

IreallyKNOWiamright Fri 04-Nov-16 09:29:31

Isn't there a term for that on mumsnet. You know where the woman ignores the wife but befriends the dh? Isn't it called a bunny boiler
????

cantpickusername Fri 04-Nov-16 09:33:33

I'm so sorry he is being such an arse flowers

I don't think I could stay in this relationship. Do you have any ideas where he might have stayed last night?

Alfiemoon1 Fri 04-Nov-16 09:37:59

No idea where he was he went off in the car about 11.30 so doubt he would go to his mums and wake her up

ballsdeep Fri 04-Nov-16 09:38:37

I would be fuming with the picture and comment! Wtf??
Op I think it's best he's gone for a bit, i wouldn't be able to live with this amount of communication with the ow, ESP as she is ignoring you!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now