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ExH's gf will be working with me

(11 Posts)
honeyJD Wed 26-Oct-16 17:21:22

Urgh.
My ex husbands gf has been promoted and as such will be joining my office. There's no bitterness or ill-feeling there, she wasn't the OW or anything and me and exH's split was amicable.
However she has overstepped boundaries a few times. Not to mention she is generally annoying as hell. I'm dreading workplace gossip surrounding it all and having my personal life and my work life mixed in this way.
How do I handle this?!

chocolatemuppet Wed 26-Oct-16 17:33:23

That's really hard! I'd struggle with that. Do you know her well? Could you talk to her? In my case, ex-H's gf tries to take over the mother role with my dc's - buying DD first bra etc - so I'm not sure I could manage it... sorry, that's not much help is it. I hope you find a way around it!

PopFizz Wed 26-Oct-16 17:36:11

Oh god I feel for you, I could never cope with this - and I have an ok relationship with my ex's girlfriend. I hate her having any overlap with my friends, work would be last straw!

Do you have kids together?

jeaux90 Wed 26-Oct-16 17:36:16

With graciousness of course and scream when you get home grin. Just be courteous and professional at work, there is no other way to handle it really. If anyone mentions it to you, smile nicely and say "ah yes well I consider that a private matter". If she is overly in your face or presumptive just say you want to keep things purely professional at work. Good luck x

honeyJD Wed 26-Oct-16 18:36:13

Yes me and exH have one DS together.
That's what I'm hating the idea of popfizz, the overlap!

jeaux90 Wed 26-Oct-16 19:02:59

Just make it clear that there is no personal talk at work as it's unprofessional. That way you can go to work and not dread it potentially coming up.

Lunar1 Wed 26-Oct-16 19:08:30

Which one of you will be senior? Not that it matters I guess but you need handle things more carefully if you are her manager. Maybe talk to her before hand about things.

RaingodswithZippos Wed 26-Oct-16 19:23:09

Oh good luck. My (abusive) ex's wife (the woman he left me for) was once a contractor for some research I had to commission for work, as soon as I saw her name I freaked out, as we didn't get on too well as I had tried to warn her about his violent ways when she first got together with him. I was polite and professional with her, but secretly was really worried about what she was saying about me to her colleagues. I still don't know if she ever said anything, but it was really weird, and my ex messaged me to instruct me to only contact her for work related purposes (like I would have tried to be her friend!!). It was awkward and I was relieved when the contract was finished.

DamePastel Wed 26-Oct-16 19:27:02

Wow chocolate muppet, that takes some nerve, to buy somebody else's dd their first bra. shock

NeeNahh Wed 26-Oct-16 20:46:29

I think that you need to decide if you can tolerate it or look for a new job. How closely would you be working with her. I imagine she is as worried about it as you are.

HarmlessChap Wed 26-Oct-16 22:30:15

I think you can only be reactive, i.e. if she over steps boundaries then tell her that you don't want your personal life discussed in the office and if she persists then I would go to your boss as I would class that kind of discussion against your wishes could constitute a form of workplace bullying.

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