Trying to make my sex life into a GBBO showstopper - help

[HollySOWOULD]

So i have a big thing about Paul Hollywood. DP is largely tolerant of this, but is starting to draw the line at some of my demands.

He already had a goatee, so that is ok and certainly has got hands that are good at kneading .

I bought that marshmallow shower gel, to make his junk smell of vanilla - for that bake off multi sensory vibe, but he won't even consider sparkly blue contacts. Or a chefs hat. AT ALL.

If those are non starters, what could I try? TIA

[Myusernameismyusername]

You could do a naked cooking session?

[sweetstemcauli]

I think you could try adding less yeast to the mixture, OP.

[Joysmum]

Have your efforts judged?

[TalcAndTurnips]

Scouse lessons for chrimbo.

That'll put the wood in his holly.

[sweetstemcauli]

Have your efforts judged?

Great idea, a kitchen worktop is the perfect height.

[HollySOWOULD]

judging - what outsiders?
I don't know where I would find a Mary Berry look-a-like who would be game, to be honest!

[HollySOWOULD]

i have got the SMELL aspect sorted.

Maybe the sound needs working on

[sweetstemcauli]

Mary Berry lookalike - doesn't matter OP, a short blond wig would do trick, just keep it out of the pancake batter.

[WutheringFrights]

Under no circumstances should you have a soggy bottom

[sweetstemcauli]

Sound - tracks like 'Burn Baby Burn' or 'Beat It' on the CD player?

[PaulineFowlersGrowler]

Maybe you could watch that together in the bedroom, buy some nice butter, see what happens......

[HollySOWOULD]

or this maybe - keep the whisking for the, er.. finale?