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What happens when you admit you aren't coping?

(12 Posts)
Fuckingitup Wed 19-Oct-16 12:47:39

I have DC. Separated from their dad. Taking me a while to pull myself together. I really feel like I'm not coping.

What happens if I go to GP - or health visitor and admit I'm not coping?

Will he be contacted. How much of my personal health details would be shared with him?

I'm scared of the consequences but I'm struggling. I want to do the right thing for DC.

faffalotty Wed 19-Oct-16 12:52:52

they can't share anything with him. Go and speak to someone

Fuckingitup Wed 19-Oct-16 13:34:36

Really? They could have concerns and not tell a parent?

We aren't divorced yet, havent formally agreed contact arrangements. Hence my nervousness.

Myusernameismyusername Wed 19-Oct-16 13:41:03

It would depend on the severity of the concerns, but usually this would be shared with other agencies (who can assist) not the father as a matter of course.
If you tell them you don't want him contacted and the reasons then they will agree to protecting confidentiality

faffalotty Wed 19-Oct-16 13:54:39

Surely patient confidentiality means that a medical professional cannot share your medical history with anyone else without your consent?
Even if you were happily married your spouse isn't entitled to know anything.

MrsRedFly Wed 19-Oct-16 13:57:03

There are other places you could contact for support eg Homestart or Gingerbread etc

rockabillyruby82 Wed 19-Oct-16 13:59:35

OP, are you worried your DC could be taken away?

Fuckingitup Wed 19-Oct-16 14:15:07

No rockabilly. It would not warrant that. Lower end of (utterly) unacceptable. But honestly, if mentioned at school eg, would probably prompt a referral because of what my DC might say. But I am sure would only result in help.

My problem is though how this would play out in terms of agreeing contact arrangements in legal process.

Because I am still very sure my DC are best with me with lots of contact with stbx.

Myusernameismyusername Wed 19-Oct-16 16:52:27

If you disclose something that a HCP feels is a safeguarding issue then they will have to act on it.

Otherwise it will be noted on medical records which for a child, could be used in court if deemed necessary

Myusernameismyusername Wed 19-Oct-16 16:54:08

I know it must seem like a scary step but it is much more damaging to let this concern hold you back/avoid seeking help than it is to go ask for the help and take the risk it might come up one day, or it might not

pallasathena Thu 20-Oct-16 08:04:44

How are you not coping exactly?
Is it hard to get up in the morning, or do you find yourself in floods of tears frequently?
Not coping with life can be frightening for the individual and its brilliant that you've reached out for help. That's the first step.

Fuckingitup Thu 20-Oct-16 19:13:41

Took a risk and talked to someone today. I actually find it very reassuring to have someone know how things have been. Thank you for taking time to respond.

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