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If your not married, do you & your dp have an anniversary?

(20 Posts)
Winniethepooer Mon 17-Oct-16 14:25:04

Just that really!

Dp & I aren't married. Never will.
We met 17 years ago today.

I used to buy him gifts & cards but stopped on our 10th anniversary as he didnt acknowledge the anniversary nor had he ever acknowledged our anniversary during that 10 years.

That year he didn't bother to open his gift as he was in a bad mood.

I thought I was being silly but it leaves me feeling sad...

ladyformation Mon 17-Oct-16 15:08:21

I've never had a relationship nearly as long as yours but I've had three which were 2+ years and we always celebrated anniversaries (the day we became official or whatever). Sorry - I don't think it's mandatory if neither party cares but it's rubbish that he's not interested despite your efforts. Have you discussed it since the 10th?

Bitofacow Mon 17-Oct-16 15:12:56

Been together forever, not married. We have several anniversaries, and I love the fact that they are just ours and no one else knows.

We make each other cards with crap drawings on. It's sad isn't it?

It's up to you lots of married couples don't bother I think

Bitofacow Mon 17-Oct-16 15:13:54

Is it a good gift. Keep it yourself. Save it for xmaswink

Lottapianos Mon 17-Oct-16 15:13:56

Yes, we celebrate the anniversary of our first date every year, always have. We usually exchange cards and go out for a nice dinner. It's been 11 years for us.

I'm not surprised you feel sad OP, I would too. You don't need to have had a wedding day to find your relationship worth celebrating.

Mum4Fergus Mon 17-Oct-16 15:21:24

We do cards and a nice meal on anniversary of day we met ...

slowhoneybee Mon 17-Oct-16 16:03:08

I know roughly the date I got together with my partner but we don't mark it. If I'm honest I think if it is a good relationship where you are good to each other everyday then anniversaries and valentine's day are meaningless. My parents have the best marriage and always forget their wedding anniversary.

wibblewobble8 Mon 17-Oct-16 16:06:47

yes here too. 12 years together and we celebrate the day of our first date every year, usually with a nice meal out and guaranteed sex :D its one of the trivial reasons im put off marriage, i dont wanna start again at 0!

We were together 10 years before we married and always acknowledged the anniversary of when we met, and still do. We don't do anything though, no cards or meals. We don't do anything for our wedding anniversary either - I guess we're not that sort of couple.
However, if DH wanted to celebrate or do cards or whatever, I'd join in the spirit of it whether I was bothered or not because it's the nice thing to do. You're not being silly, he's being an arse - I hope everything else about him makes up for it. Have some anniversary flowers from me.

hellsbellsmelons Mon 17-Oct-16 16:50:10

We were a bit on/off to start with so we don't really have an anniversary.
There is one slightly special day and we'll go out for a meal that evening.

Lonoxo Mon 17-Oct-16 16:56:40

I was with my DH for years before we got married. We decided that a particular month was our anniversary and usually went out for a meal. To be honest, I'm not keen on cards and gifts as we are running out of space. Instead of stuff, how about experiences? You could decide that you are going to try something new, go to new restaurant or away for the weekend and either plan it together or take turns each year.

MaryField Mon 17-Oct-16 17:01:58

Yes, first date if either of us remembers! 32 years happily unmarried

offside Mon 17-Oct-16 17:05:57

We've been together nearly 5 years. Never celebrated an Anniversary by buying cards/gifts but pre DD we would maybe go for a lovely day out. This has been DPs choice. He said he will always celebrate our wedding anniversary (we get married next year) but didn't see the point in celebrating any other anniversary.

TwoWeeksInCyprus Mon 17-Oct-16 17:07:14

We're married now but used to have our "anniversary" on the day we met. More an exchange of cards and going out for dinner thing rather than presents (as over the years both of us have run out of ideas about what to buy!)

Goldorsilver Mon 17-Oct-16 17:09:00

Yes we do. It's roughly the first weekend in October. We have been together for 8 years.

CharminglyGawky Mon 17-Oct-16 17:12:42

I am married but we always marked our anniversaries before marriage. Didn't make a fuss other than the first year but we note it in passing and normally either get an m&s dine in thing and cuddle up with a film or go to the cinema or something. No cards or gifts but we mark it.

We will have been together 6 years later this month and it is our first wedding anniversary next month.

DH would probably forget if I didn't remind him though!

Winniethepooer Mon 17-Oct-16 17:40:16

I don't think gifts or cards are necessary to celebrate an anniversary.

Just remembering or acknowledging would be nice.

We're not a 'real' couple now so I am being daft. I suppose it just made me feel sad that we don't have any celebration of our relationship.

I told dp how offended I was about our 10 year anniversary. I don't think 'he got it'.

PopFizz Mon 17-Oct-16 19:20:48

We acknowledge it. Usually by a text, sometimes a soppy fb message (I had a pretty crap marriage for affection, and four years on my own) but it's noted. Nothing major - but tbh that's probably because it's right between our birthdays which are only two weeks apart and we are often celebrating then anyway.

daisymoon77 Mon 17-Oct-16 21:28:06

We're married but we actually do more to celebrate the anniversary of our first date rather than our wedding anniversary.

HeddaGarbled Mon 17-Oct-16 21:39:37

What a grumpy, thoughtless arse he sounds.

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