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Can you fix things?

(4 Posts)
pinkpixie83 Fri 14-Oct-16 15:10:32

Have had some issues with my boyfriend where he tends to leave me feeling unimportant and like I don't matter can things like this be fixed or not?

We both have children from pervious marriages, I have three, live with them, work 25hrs a week and get every other weekend off, he has one lives with his parents and works from home, has his child every Tuesday and every other weekend.

He at times seems to ignore me when I say something he doesn't like and can also seem reluctant to properly join in family life.

He wants to talk tonight, after me presuming we were over? After a period of 10 days no contact, I did then contact him, he blamed me for the lack of contact. I will then admit to sending some ranty messages saying he didn't ever properly care for me bla bla.

He has text today wanting to talk about it?

AttilaTheMeerkat Fri 14-Oct-16 15:18:20

Why do you not block and ignore him from now on?. He just wants to yank your chain again to see if you'll respond.

No, you cannot fix this and besides which a person can never act as either a rescuer or saviour in any relationship.

Why are you together at all; this is not how an adult relationship should be at all conducted. Relationships should not be such hard work, this is really a car crash of a relationship.

Is this really also what you want to teach your children about relationships, are you really wanting to show them that this from him is still acceptable to you on some level?

hermione2016 Fri 14-Oct-16 16:24:16

Ignoring when you say something he doesn't like is a big red flag and then blaming.I so wished I had worked out what was happening with my now husband as after many years of trying to fix it I have accepted it's just not healthy.

You will change into an angry person as you get exasperated by his attacking of you.Please accept that it won't change and will get worse.Its been soul destroying living with someone who won't take responsibility and who blames.

Trust me when I say you can't change him.

TheNaze73 Fri 14-Oct-16 18:03:45

What things are you saying that he doesn't like? If someone had ranted at me & I felt it was unwarranted, I wouldn't bother getting in contact.
Do you feel you were fully justified in what you said?

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