Hi everyone. Am looking for some female insight please. I’ll condense this as much as possible.
My wife and I have been married for just over a year and have been together for 8 years. We’ve always had a really good relationship, full of love and understanding, and still do. However, there have been outside problems that have seeped in and have caused a problem for us.
Just before we got married, my wife’s relationship with her Dad broke down and they are now no longer in each other’s lives. My wife has a complicated relationship with her Dad and she took a lot of the emotional slack for her family when she was a teenager and young adult. After the relationship with him ended, she was very depressed and I did my best to support her through it all. The grief she felt was huge and it really hit her hard.
She sought out some therapy and worked to get over it and get herself in a better place emotionally, and again, I was fully behind this.
The thing is my wife now feels as though she needs some time alone to grow. She wants to get happy in herself. She says she loves me and I’m everything she wants in a partner, but at the moment, she feels she needs some time alone to work out who she is and how she fits into the world.
She also feels like the sexual spark she held for me has disappeared and it’s not coming back easily at the moment. She says she wants to be with me but currently doesn’t feel she can work on herself and be living together at the same time.
We’ve been in couple’s therapy and she’s been staying at a friend’s place for a few weeks to get some of her own space. We’ve been seeing each other once a week in that time, and also at therapy sessions.
At the end of the day if she needs some space to grow, I support her in this, and it allows me to do the same. We both hope that some time living in separate spaces will help us as a partnership in the long run after some personal growth. But naturally I’m really concerned for the future and what will happen with us as a couple.
I’m mainly after some female perspective on this as I try and grapple with what’s happening with us. Has anyone been through anything similar?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Husband in need of advice
PresentTense · 14/10/2016 13:39
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