Recommendations for counsellors

[Goingtobeawesome]

Can anyone help with how on Earth you find the right person to help when there are difficulties in a marriage? Private is the plan but it's not like Argos where you can read the reviews first .

[BolshierAryaStark]

Some counsellors do have reviews.
I've just contacted one, for one on one not marriage, I just googled the type of counselling I wanted & my area. The one I've chosen does quite a long initial consultation for us to get a feel for the other & decide if I think she can help.

[Goingtobeawesome]

Thank you BAS. It's actually a mix of things but I didn't want to say .

[PsychedelicSheep]

Don't bother with Relate, they are oversubscribed and undertrained. Like going for a Pizza Hut instead of a nice local family run pizzeria say. Just because theyr a brand you've heard of doesn't mean they're better. The opposite even.

Use BACPs website to find someone preferably accredited who has actual training in working with couples, or is trained in family systems theoretical approach. Many counsellors see couples when they haven't had any specific training to do it which I think is wrong. Don't worry about booking initial meetings with a few and picking your preferred option.

Last a disclaimer, if there is any abuse in your marriage either physical or emotional or otherwise please don't see a couples counsellor together but find someone to see alone.

[RunRabbitRunRabbit]

You and DH go through the BACP lists separately. Make a shortlist of about 10 each, then cross reference. It would probably be helpful to have agreed with DH what outcomes you are each seeking from the counselling (it might be different for each of you).

I do think though that whenever you are considering couples counselling you should first do some individual counselling to get your own head a bit clearer first.

[Goingtobeawesome]

Thank you. Even doing that scares me . I've had unrelated counselling, kind of, but they can't see me anymore so I'm awaiting seeing a nhs counsellor.