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Emotional affair

(11 Posts)
DollyPS Tue 27-Sep-16 11:09:14

Can a relationship recover from one even if it was years ago and discovery was made a few weeks ago from finding a letter.


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Mybeardeddragonjustdied2016 Tue 27-Sep-16 11:15:25

Not for me it couldn't.

LucyLocketLostIt Tue 27-Sep-16 11:16:16

From what I've heard, it's possible but very hard work and things will be different between you if you do get through it.

redisthenewblack Tue 27-Sep-16 11:17:30

I don't think there's a black and white answer to this. I think it very much depends on the individuals involved and the relationship as a whole.

How do you feel about it?

artlessflirt Tue 27-Sep-16 11:22:52

I think it depends on the relationship, the depth of the EA and the circumstances surrounding it.

I really do believe that before you even begin thinking about recovering the relationship you have to get it straight in your head about how it makes you feel, whether you can live with it moving down the line, if you can recover trust, etc.

SheldonsSpot Tue 27-Sep-16 11:25:35

For me, no, as from the point of the EA onwards the whole relationship has been built on a lie, with one person (the 'wronged' partner) not in possession of the true facts/true history of their own relationship.

I think I could work through an affair if I found out about it at the time, but in this scenario there are years of deceit and the whole relationship, everything that as been built since the EA is tainted.

DollyPS Tue 27-Sep-16 12:13:38

I'm angry and hurt over it all.
He claimed he didn't know what an emotional affair was.
He thought they where friends yeah ok but to talk to her on the phone for ages. To confide in her not me you get the picture. I'd would have found it easier if he fucked her as this is harder to recover from.

I know it was a long time ago but its like a wound has been opened and its hard to heal if it ever heals.

artlessflirt Tue 27-Sep-16 12:16:26

Oh, Dolly flowers

Do you think some time apart might give you some time to get your head around it and see a way forward, either with or without him?

User14625592 Tue 27-Sep-16 12:19:07

It depends how happy I was currently. If still not overly happy then no. If happy then I would give it a try.

hangingoutattheendofmywick Tue 27-Sep-16 12:33:52

only you know the answer to that question. Don't listen to him or anyone else. Listen to you and decide if you can ultimately forgive / understand.

TheNaze73 Tue 27-Sep-16 12:52:21

Can only be your call OP

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